Page 50 of Frosty Felicity
“When he saw us, he ran off across the street. He then stood there with a lit cigarette by a pump, daring to toss it. That was a real fun time. Later on, we had a call about a lady walking around in a diaper on her head, making bird noises.”
Felicity opened her kitchen pantry door and picked up a can of vegetable soup. I’ll jazz this up, add some seasonings to make it taste better.
“Bird noises?”
“Yeah. She also had a knife, so we had to tase her. That meant we couldn’t FIDO it.”
“Fido? Like sic a dog on her?”
“Oh, no. It’s our jargon. It means, ‘fuck it, drive on,’ as in, we avoid writing someone up because we don’t want to deal with the paperwork. Once we saw the knife, we knew we’d have to go on and get her.”
“Oh, I see.” She reached for the onion powder. Just a dab or two would do.
“Then we had another situation where some lady had lost her dentures, and called the police saying it was an emergency.” He rolled his eyes. “She called 911 about some damn dentures, Felicity. Can you believe this?” She chuckled hard as she placed the pot on the eye, then dumped the soup inside and began using the seasonings she’d grabbed.
“I’ll tell you one thing, the mental health of some of these people is really declining! I’m exhausted tonight. I don’t know if there isn’t enough programs or funding, I imagine both, but something has to give.” He slipped out of his jacket, placed it on the back of his chair, then proceeded to remove his gun, Taser, and the handcuffs. They sat there talking for a bit as she got his food together. “I’m going to use the bathroom. I’ll be right back.”
She nodded and kept on cooking and fixing the sandwich just so. About four or five minutes later, she heard strange noises in high volume…
“Ahhhh! Yes, officer! I won’t steal again! Ohhh! It’s too big!”
“Do the crime, you gotta get the time, baby! I’m gonna steal your ass! Show you what a real crook looks and feels like!”
Felicity’s body went hot as she bolted down the hallway and bust in her bedroom. There stood Brent, looking down at the computer, his eyes wide, brows crumpled, and a look of disgust and shock on his face.
“This is what you’re into?”
She raced towards him, and quickly slammed the computer closed.
“You violated my privacy.”
“I opened your computer to turn on some music.”
“You could’ve asked me, used your phone, or Alexa.”
“The computer was right here. It seemed easier. Don’t try to get off topic. Is this what you’re into? Yes or no?”
She swallowed, crossed her arms, and worked through the sheer awkwardness of being discovered. Her dirty little secret.
“…Yes.”
“For how long has this been your thing?”
Her eyes darted to the little red rose vibrator that was partially hidden under her sheets. She hoped to hell he didn’t see it. Well hell, even if he did, he won’t know what in the world it is…
“Felicity… Earth to Felicity. How long has this been a kink for you?”
“Way before I met you, if that’s what you’re getting at. You didn’t spur it on.”
“So, you’ve had fantasies of cops abusing their power, in a sexual manner, for a while?”
“Yes, but when you put it that way, it sounds so twisted and grotesque. I prefer to watch it knowing that it’s a willing participant… like, she’s only pretending to resist, or wants to pay off the debt with a sexual favor, to avoid jail. As in that video. She offered him a blowjob to let her go.”
“Mmm hmmm…” He crossed his beefy arms, looking rather disturbed. It was quite evident she was only digging a hole for herself, making it deeper and deeper.
“The soup may be burning. I better go check.”
“Please don’t add any pepper. I’ve had enough pepper from you to last me a lifetime.”
