Page 35 of A Shade of Myself
I switched back to a more lighthearted topic before I said anything that would drive him off. “There’s still the most serious charge that you have yet to refute. You taunted me with fries.”
“True.” He tapped a finger against his lip, and I tracked the movement, wanting to suck it into my mouth. “What if I promise to never withhold your beloved salad?”
I punched him but he caught my fist and tucked it against his chest, twisting to face me.
“Hi, Mitzi,” he said softly. “I missed you.”
I preened like a cat. “Hey, Huff ’n’ Puff. I might have spared a thought or two for you.”
“Come home with me tonight. We can get technical and fuck.” His voice lowered to a growl.
Squirming, I crossed my legs. “This is my week with Sadie.” I am a responsible parent. I will not abandon my child to have sex. Really really good sex. Though she is sixteen and it’s not like I would have to spend the night. What am I saying? I gave myself a mental slap. “I can’t.”
His eyes darted to the nipples poking up through my dress, the gleam in his eyes sharpening when I licked my lips. He could press me backward against the hood, his body pinning me in place while I gripped his biceps, his mouth devouring mine.
I ran my hands up his arms, while he leaned toward me, his fingers skipping up the inside of my thigh, nudging my legs apart.
My breathing turned shallow. The cool metal hood under my thighs did little against the hot flush spiralling through me. My lids fell half-shut. There was the barest tease of breeze against my thighs, but it was replaced with the heat of his fingers.
I blessed my sliding underwear for making access so much easier and arched my hips.
Laurent flared his nostrils and dipped his head to mine.
A car backfired, and reality crashed down like ice water. I was sitting spread-eagle on a car with my dress halfway up my thighs, out in public where anyone could pass by. I pushed his hands away, smoothing down the fabric.
He stood up with a wry shake of his head. “I should go. Boo needs to be fed.”
“Yeah.” Holy shit, I needed to go home and get myself off. Although one good pothole on the drive back might do the trick.
“Au revoir.” He headed for his truck, and I smiled wistfully, wishing the night didn’t have to end so soon.
“Laurent?”
He turned around.
“We were always okay.” I should have trusted that you wouldn’t callously screw around, but my insecurities had run rampant at the sight of the two of you and I’d felt impossibly old and unglamorous. And it didn’t matter how many empowerment speeches I gave myself, sometimes I would regress and not have the confidence I should because I’d felt overlooked for so many years, relegated to an ex, a mother, a person-adjacent adjective instead of being first and foremost myself.
Except I didn’t voice any of that because my throat was tight, and we weren’t those people to each other. We were good friends having a good time.
Laurent’s expression softened, as if maybe he understood all of that anyway, and I pressed my lips together, hoping nothing in my expression gave my thoughts away.
Then he threw me a cocky smile. “Of course we were okay.”
His superciliousness eased a knot in my chest. He hadn’t read anything into my words beyond the obvious.
I opened my car door, almost not catching his final quiet words.
“We had to be.”
