Page 109 of Without a Hitch
“And you named her…Pussy?” Delaney asks hesitantly.
“Yup.”
Eli pinches the bridge of her nose, and I know this is my chance to sneak out. They’ll be caught up with Mable for at least an hour. With all eyes on Eli, I slip off the sofa and scoot down the hall to my room.
Overwhelming sadness threatens to drag me under as I flop facedown onto my bed. With my head buried in a pillow, grief like I’ve only read about seeps from my soul and soaks the soft cotton.
Why does it hurt so much to love someone who can never love you back? After a while, I roll onto my back and pull out my phone. I know it won’t be long before the girls come find me, but I can’t seem to let Lochlan go completely. Not yet.
Scrolling until his name appears on my screen, I don’t give myself a chance to back out. I press send and wait with my heart in my throat as it connects. It doesn’t cycle through one full ring before he answers.
“Tilly? What’s wrong? Are you okay?”
A tearful smile forms on my face. “I’m okay.” My voice wobbles, and I curse myself for having no self-control.
“Till. Darling.” His heavy breathing has me imagining him pacing the beach house. “I miss you.”
“Why did you send a messenger to check on me? You have my number.”
“Christ, Tilly.” I pull the phone away at his harsh tone.
“This was a mistake. I—I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have…”
“Do not hang up this phone,” he bellows. “Let me finish.” He’s silent for a beat, and I swear all the blood in my body rushes to my head. “I wasn’t sure you’d want to hear from me, Till. This is unchartered territory for me. And truthfully, the damn song threw me for a loop.”
I nearly choke on my own saliva. “Song?”
“The song you changed my ringtone to. I nearly fell out of your bloody floating bed of doom.”
“You—you haven’t changed the ringtone yet? Wait! What are you doing in the hammock?” I sit up in bed, dragging a pillow to my chest. Clutching it to me, I hope it drowns out the wild beating that’s raging like a freight train in my ears.
“I wanted to be close to you. To something that you love, anyway.”
“Why?”
“Because the kindling was lit for me too, Till.”
My breath is harsh as it drags through my teeth, trying to fill my lungs to drown out the painful beat of my heart.
“I don’t know where to go from here,” I admit. The words feel like razor blades slicing through my lips.
“Me either. But I know I don’t like this, Tilly. Not at all. I had three more days with you.”
He’s still focused on our ending. There’s no talk of an extension. No talk of a future. Just absolute certainty that we end. My heart shatters all over again.
“I’m home. I’m safe,” I force out. “I’ll see you Saturday.”
“Tilly?”
“Good-bye, Lochlan.” I end the call and turn off my phone. That was a mistake, but he owns my heart, even if he can’t protect it. I’m weak to the pull of him in every way. Through blurry eyes, I notice Delaney leaning on my doorframe.
“Oh, sweetie.” She crosses the room with open arms and tears in her eyes. “What happened?”
“He doesn’t have room in his heart right now.” My body heaves as I cry into my beautiful friend’s shoulder.
“I found her,” Hadley calls from the doorway.
“You didn’t think you could hide forever, did you?” Delaney whispers.
