Page 51 of Jar of Hearts
“Shut up, Kai,” Angela said absently. The two girls stared at each other. Finally, Angela shrugged and took the Slurpee, taking a long sip. “Yeah. Okay. It’s over.”
“Hug it out,” Kaiser said. When they didn’t move, he engulfed them both in a bear hug. Skinny arms wrapped around them, squeezing them tight, and the three of them stood like that for a moment. Nobody said anything.
Then, Kaiser being Kaiser, he ruined it. “Every man’s fantasy, right here,” he quipped. “Ang, where’s your camera? Let’s take a picture.”
They broke apart, and Angela smacked him on the arm. But she was smiling, and so was Geo. She’d forgotten how much she’d missed this, the weird and comforting dynamic of the three of them.Angela’s camera was in the kitchen, and Kaiser grabbed it, taking a picture of them together in the hallway mirror.
“I’m ordering pizza,” he announced, traipsing back down the hallway. There was a phone in the living room. The two girls exchanged a look and followed.
They spent the next few hours eating Domino’s and fooling around with Angela’s new camera. It was a brand-new Nikon, something her father had won in a golf tournament but had no use for, and which he’d bestowed upon his daughter as if he’d picked out the gift on purpose. They snapped a bunch of silly pictures, wasting film, until Kaiser had to go.
“He likes you,” Angela said when he was gone. They were up in her bedroom now, listening to one of her mix tapes. Pearl Jam, Alanis Morissette, No Doubt. “And not just as a friend.”
“I know,” Geo said, feeling a little bad.
“He hates Calvin.”
“I know,” she said again, and this made her feel worse.
Geo had met Kaiser on the first day of freshman year at St. Martin’s. He sat behind her in science, and wouldn’t stop kicking the back of her chair, even though she’d turned around and glared at him twice. After class, he followed her down the hallway, a little too closely. She was about to accuse him of bothering her, until she realized his locker was right beside hers. He spent the rest of the year annoying the hell out of her, but along the way, she learned to accept his friendship. He gave it so damned freely, with no expectation of anything in return except kindness.
Angela didn’t know what to do with Kaiser at first. His social status was only barely acceptable thanks to his prowess on the soccer field and basketball court, and he’d have been reasonably cute if he didn’t have acne on his jaw. And braces. But over time, he grew on her, too. He was mild-mannered and unassuming, and he laughed at her jokes.
“He’s thinking of dating someone now,” Angela said. She was lying upside down on the bed, her legs resting against the headboard. Geo was sitting on the carpet, legs crossed, near the stereo. “Nowthat you’re with Calvin and there’s officially no hope.” Angela paused for dramatic effect, then said, “Barb Polanco.”
“Backseat Barbie?”Geo was horrified. “No. You tell him no way.”
“I’m not telling him shit,” her friend said with a laugh. “Au contraire. I told him to go for it. The guy deserves to get laid.”
Geo knew Barb a little bit from gym class, and the truth was, she didn’t think the girl was a slut at all. It was a nasty rumor started by Barb’s ex-boyfriend after she dumped him, and Geo felt slightly ashamed for saying the unfortunate nickname out loud. Deep down, she knew why she did.
She was a tiny little bit jealous. She’d never had to share Kaiser with anyone but Angela, and even so, not really.
Out loud, she said, “You’re right. It’s great. Good for him.”
Angela rolled over to look at her. “So you don’t care? I thought you liked that he pines for you. If he has a girlfriend, he won’t be around as much.” She frowned. “You know what? Now that I think about it, you both suck. I would never ignore either of you for a guy.”
Geo couldn’t argue. Because it was true. God knows Angela had her flaws—she was moody, critical, and bossy as hell—but not once had she ever allowed a boy to come between them. And that was saying a lot, considering how many boys she had chasing her at any one time. What Geo had been doing with Calvin was a direct violation of girl code, a big offense. She had a lot of making up to do.
“You were right about my head being up my ass.” She joined Angela on the bed, propping her legs up on the headboard as well. “Our fight… that was a wake-up call. I don’t want to throw my whole life away for a guy. My grades are slipping, my dad doesn’t know anything about Calvin, and I’ve been lying to him about where I go… and now I’m off cheer. It’s got to stop. It’s just, I’ve never felt this way about a guy before. You know me, Ang. I don’t go crazy. I don’t get stupid. But with Calvin, I can’t control it. I want to be with him all the time, and I know it’s not healthy.”
“You guys had sex yet?” Angela asked, her voice casual.
“No!”
“Seriously?” She seemed genuinely surprised. “I figured all the orgasms were messing with your brain.”
“I didn’t say I wasn’t having orgasms,” Geo said, her face reddening instantly. She had never been completely comfortable discussing sex, even with Angela, who had lost her virginity the year before and was completely open to talking about it. It felt even weirder because it was Calvin. She loved him, and she believed that certain things should stay private. However, she sensed that holding back about her relationship with him was not the way to go, considering the problems it had already caused. Geo was the one who had changed, who had shut Angela out. She had to let her best friend be part of what was happening with her boyfriend. “We do… other stuff.”
“Does he go down on you?” Angela’s grin was knowing and wicked.
“Ang,” Geo said, pained, but a few seconds later, she pulled a pillow over her face. “Yes.” Her voice was muffled. “All the time. He… he likes it.”
Angela cackled. “No wonder you disappeared. But I get it. Has he tried talking you into going all the way?”
Geo moved the pillow. “No, actually. He says it should only happen when I’m ready. And I think I’m getting there.”
“You only get one first time,” Angela said, her voice matter-of-fact. “Don’t do what I did and waste it on the wrong person.”
