Page 54 of Because I Need You
“You didn’t move on from it, though. You were scared when you saw him. Terrified. Do you think he was one of the men who robbed your dad’s house?” I asked, even though I knew the answer to that.
“No.” She bit her lip, crossing her arms again. “He’s a lawyer. The guy.”
“What’s his name?”
“I’m not going to tell you his name.” Her eyes widened; her arms dropped at her sides.
I reminded myself to breathe. Rein it in. I wanted answers and I knew I wouldn’t get them if I lost my cool. Still, I was two seconds from losing my cool and taking the six steps to crowd her so she’d tell me. I ground my teeth together and stayed put.
“Who was he?” My eyes narrowed slightly. “I’m not going to ask again.”
“Oh.” She raised an eyebrow, laughing as she walked out of the bathroom and into the room. “That’s a funny demand, since it’s my problem and I don’t remember saying I wanted to tell you.”
I stayed by the door, watching as she pulled on her sweatpants and started walking out of the bedroom. Panic rose inside me, reaching my throat and clasping. I knew she wouldn’t, couldn’t leave, and yet, I felt my skin crawling at the thought of her walking out on me. Chalk it up to mommy issues. Hell, to mommy and daddy issues. I didn’t appreciate people walking out on me unless I was finished with them, and I wasn’t finished with her. Not by a long shot. I followed her through the kitchen, through the living room, and into the guest room. She started picking up the few things she’d taken out of her bag when she showered in here last night.
“You can’t leave,” I said, a reminder, a threat.
“I’m well aware.” She met my gaze, expression hard. “But I’m assuming we’re going back to Chicago. To Dave’s office for whatever it is he needs to give me.”
“I just want to know what he did to you, Isabel. Put me out of my misery and tell me and I’ll leave you alone. I swear.”
“Jesus Christ.” She let her head fall back with a groan. “You’re really not going to let this go, are you?”
“Nope.” It was the truth. I wouldn’t.
“I’ve never even told anyone.” She swallowed again, bringing a hand up and chewing on the tip of her finger like she’d done to mine as I was pounding into her from behind last night. Fuck. Not the time to think about that right now.
“Tell me,” I said, voice quiet, hoping I sounded calmer than my insides felt.
“Fine.” Her eyes flared on mine. “I’ll tell you, but you do not get to touch me again until I say so.”
“What?” The panic rose again. “Why?”
“Do you want me to tell you or not?”
“Yes.” I groaned. “How long is this for, the no touching thing? Like right now in the next five minutes?”
“Until I say it’s okay,” she said, and the fire was back in her eyes, so I knew she meant business. “Definitely not in the next five minutes, maybe not in the next five days. Maybe not ever.”
“Fuck.” I ran a hand through my hair, heart pounding. “I don’t like this agreement.”
“If you want me to tell you, that’s the agreement.” She continued to stare at me. I stared back. I didn’t say anything. I weighed it out. How long would she not let me touch her for? An hour? A day? A week? A month? Panic rose each time a new thought formed. I couldn’t promise her that. “And you can’t talk to me the entire ride to Chicago. From the moment I tell you until the moment we get to the house.”
“Fine.” I took a deep breath and let it out. I could do this. I hadn’t touched her until last night even though I’d been dying to, what was one more day, or week, or month? The thought clawed at me, though. I gave a nod. “I always keep my promises.” It wasn’t a lie. If I gave you my word, I gave you my fucking word.
“He raped me,” she said simply, as if reading the fucking weather. I felt the air swoosh out of my lungs as I stared at her. Not what I’d been expecting. I was expecting…fuck, I don’t know? A bully? Someone who’d threatened her? An asshole ex-boyfriend? But rape? I clenched my fists when I felt myself begin to shake and let her continue speaking without interruption. I owed her that much. “We were in college. I’d just left a party and him and a friend of his…they just…yeah. They raped me.” She blinked rapidly, trying to obviously hold back tears. She wiped them before they could fall. “I hadn’t seen him again until yesterday. I didn’t even know I knew what he looked like.”
