Page 10 of Dotted Lines (Runaway 5)

My mantra this year.

I dropped my gaze, pretending to inspect my wet shoe.

This wasn’t entirely new. I’d seen Karson without a shirt on before, but it hadn’t been for a while. And back then, he’d belonged to Londyn. It had been easier to pretend I wasn’t head over heels for the guy when his girlfriend had always been nearby.

Now it was impossible.

He was lean, we were all lean, but Karson was cut too. His chest was broad, his stomach hard and flat. There was a V just where the terry cloth circled his hips.

My mouth went dry thinking about the slight bulge beneath that towel. The flush in my cheeks felt hot and red.

Oh my God. I sucked at this. How was I supposed to hide my crush on Karson when he walked around in nothing but a towel?

“I . . .” I swallowed hard and stepped through the open door, moving past him, careful to keep a wide berth. “I’ll get out of your way.”

“You’re not in my way.”

I gave him a small smile, then dropped my chin to my chest and watched every one of my steps as I scurried away, only daring to look back when I heard the shop door close.

“Ugh,” I groaned, looking up to the blue sky. “What is wrong with me?”

Karson was never going to like me. Ever. He was in love with Londyn. The two of them had lived together in the Cadillac for years. She might have left for Montana with Gemma and Katherine, but that didn’t mean Karson would ever want me instead.

Londyn, with her silky blond hair three shades lighter than my own. Londyn, with her pretty smile and rich green eyes. Karson and Londyn. He loved her. He’d had sex with her. I’d heard them once, giggling and kissing. Then the Cadillac had started to rock, and I’d had to sleep with the pillow over my face to block out the noise and hide my tears from Aria.

He wanted Londyn, not me.

The only reason Karson was still here at the junkyard was because he saw Aria and me as little sisters. He’d stayed to watch out for us even though he’d just turned nineteen and by all rights should have left over a year ago.

Like Londyn, Gemma and Katherine.

The girls had done exactly what Aria and I would be doing in sixty-one days. The day they were all eighteen, they’d hopped on a bus destined for Montana. Katherine had found them housekeeping jobs at a resort or ranch or something.

But Karson had stayed, saying it wasn’t safe for Aria and me to be here alone.

He wasn’t wrong.

It would just be easier if I didn’t have this epic, ridiculous crush on a guy who was never, ever, ever going to like me. Karson probably thought I was a freak. As the months went on, it got harder and harder to make eye contact as we talked. Then there were the times that I stuttered like a moron. Example: today.

“Great, Clara. Just great,” I huffed as I reached the truck and Aria’s plants.

Whereas I’d spent my extra change on books, Aria had splurged on a hand trowel and seed packets. How she got anything to grow in the dry, hard-packed dirt of the junkyard was a mystery, but the greenery proved it possible.

She’d planted cosmos and morning glories. She had Shasta daisies and sweet potato vines. I’d water them all, grateful for their color to brighten our temporary home.

The watering can was empty too soon, and I’d need to take a few more trips to the bathroom for refills, but I climbed into the truck instead. Once Karson was showered and dressed, I’d venture out. In the meantime, I’d spend my morning studying.

And do my best to forget about the definition in Karson’s arms and the gold and green sparkle in his hazel eyes.

I kicked off my shoes, leaving them by the sliding door we left up most days to let in the fresh air. Then I made myself comfortable on my bedroll, which was just a sleeping bag that had lost most of its fluff over the years. It was still warm, combined with the fleece blanket I draped on top, but even the foam cushion under the covers didn’t hide the fact that we were sleeping on a metal floor.

My GED study guide rested on top of the wheel well. I grabbed it, cracking it to the section where I’d left off last, and began hammering through practice questions.

I was in the middle of a language arts section when a knock came on the wall.

“Hey.” Karson vaulted into the truck, fully clothed.

I forced a smile to hide my disappointment.