Page 54 of The Lucky Heart (Jamison Valley 3)
When she was sitting on those tires with her face flushed and her hair pulled back, I’d tell her anything.
“Dad is having a hard time passing the baton. He’s no different than a lot of old farmers and ranchers. The old way is the only way, you know?”
She nodded. “He’s set in his ways.”
“To a fault. I can’t imagine it’s easy letting go of something he’s poured his blood, sweat and tears into for his entire life, and I’m not unsympathetic to how hard it is to let go. His own merit and hard work made this ranch a success. But the problem is, he’s robbing me of the chance to do the same.”
“Have you talked to him about it?”
“I’ve tried but we always end up in a fight.”
Dad and I been having the same argument for decades. I’d pitch him a new idea, he’d shoot it down without consideration, and we’d both start yelling. He always had an excuse as to why my idea wouldn’t work. Before I went into the army, he’d tell me I was too young and didn’t know better. After I came home from Iraq, he’d say I’d been gone too long and didn’t know how things were done here anymore. These days, it was taking him longer to come up with excuses, but he’d eventually think of some bullshit to throw my way.
The truth was, he didn’t like change.
“What about your mom?” Felicity asked. “Could she help by talking to h
im?”
I smiled. “Mom always says that Dad has two wives, her and the ranch. She jokes that he’d let her go before the Lucky Heart and I don’t know if she’s wrong.”
Her beautiful blue eyes widened. “Yikes.”
“It’ll work itself out eventually.” Dad wasn’t getting younger, and worst-case scenario, he’d keep control until he was too old to run the ranch and then he’d be forced to turn it over. I just hated that, at this point, the worst-case scenario was looking like the most likely scenario.
Time for a subject change. “Thanks for listening.”
She smiled. “Always.”
“How are you? You had a rough day.”
She looked to her feet as she considered her answer. “I think I’m okay.” She looked up and I studied her face to make sure it was the truth. “I feel . . . different. Lighter, maybe? I don’t know if that’s the right description, but I feel like a weight is off my shoulders. I carried a lot of guilt over that party and Wes’s meth addiction, and I’m hurt that he lied to me. I thought we loved each other enough not to lie. It’s going to take some time to come to terms with everything, but I’ll get there.”
I nodded. “Yeah. You’ll get there.” I’d do everything in my power to see she did.
“I just wish I’d had the chance to apologize.”
“For what?”
“For, um, what we did. That night.” She blushed and looked back to her feet.
“Oh.” She meant fucking me. She felt bad and wanted to apologize to Wes for fucking me. She still thought that making love to me that night had been a mistake. Which really fucking stung, because I thought that night had been one of the best in my life.
I took a long drink of my water, counting the bubbles as they popped in the bottle, and reined in the pain. What I really wanted to do was throw the bottle across the room and go five minutes balls-out on the heavy bag. But where Lis was concerned, I always tried to keep a hold on my temper.
“What were you doing at the farm anyway?” she asked.
“Dropping off a check. We bought some hay from Jack, and Mom forgot to stick it in the mail. I needed a break so I decided just to drive it over. I was coming out of their barn and saw you walking up to Wes’s grave.”
“Why’d you follow me?”
Because I want to be around you all the time. Because this distance I’ve tried to keep is killing me. Because I need to know if you will ever stop loving Wes.
No. The truth would be too much for today. “I just figured that wasn’t going to be easy for you.”
She smiled and whispered, “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.”
