Page 39 of The Lucky Heart (Jamison Valley 3)
“Thank you for understanding. I’ll always regret leaving the way that I did and for being too much of a coward to admit that I was scared. I should have tried to tell you that years ago, but I was too busy being stubborn and trying to prove myself in the city. I was too afraid to come back and face everyone. My apology is long overdue.”
My fears had driven me out of Prescott and kept me away. I had been terrified of coming back to Prescott. I had been scared of a confrontation with Wes. Mostly I had been scared to see that Silas had moved on with someone better. Someone that would never hurt him like I had.
Silas shook his head. “I’ve never met anyone that’s as hard on themself as you are.”
“Maybe.” I shrugged. Maybe not.
Our waitress came over with our cheeseburgers and provided a welcome end to our serious conversation.
“Tell me about your life,” I said as we ate. “What have you been doing these last sixteen years?”
Our hookups over the last couple of years hadn’t been overly chatty, so we basically had a decade and a half to catch up on. I was curious what his life had been like.
“Really? You want to know?” he asked.
“Really. Don’t friends know stuff about one another’s lives?”
“I guess friends do.”
Why did he keep doing that, drawing out the word “friend”? This truce was just as much his idea as mine, so he could be a little more positive.
“You go first,” he said.
“It hasn’t been all that eventful. I drove from here to Seattle. Found a small community college and got my degree. Started working for a software company after school and I’ve been with them ever since. This summer I decided that Seattle wasn’t for me anymore and came home.”
“That’s it, huh?”
“In a nutshell. Now enough stalling. It’s your turn.”
“I went into the army. Stayed for ten years. Came home. Picked back up with work on the ranch.”
“Ten years is a lot more than the three or four you had planned. What happened?”
“September eleventh,” he said.
Right. “Were you deployed to the Middle East?”
He nodded. “Yeah. Did three tours in Iraq.”
“Thank you for your service.”
He nodded again and went back to his meal.
“Does it bother you to talk about?”
“Not much anymore. The first couple of years back home were the worst but I worked through it. I try to keep in touch with the guys from my squad and talk to them when it gets to me.”
“I’m glad you have them.” I didn’t push for more details of his army life. If he wanted to talk to me about that time, I’d be happy to listen, but for now, I was just grateful that he had been willing to serve and that he had come home safely. “What’s new on the ranch?”
“Things at the ranch are hectic.” He raked a hand through his hair. “Gus Johnson, our hired man, fucked up his back again so he’s pretty much out of commission. I have no idea how I’m going to get all of the calving and spring work done one man down.”
“Is there anyone else around you could hire?”
“Yeah,” he huffed, “but Dad’s being picky. I get his reasoning. He’d rather find the right guy than the right-now guy, but since he’s dragging his feet, I’m probably going to end up doing it all myself.”
“I, uh, don’t know anything about ranch work, but I’d come and help you. I could do the easy jobs that no one else wants. Cleaning or whatever.”
His french fry stopped in midair. “Seriously?”
