Page 121 of The Lucky Heart (Jamison Valley 3)
“My parents both died when you were a baby and they left me a small sum. I used it along with what I’d managed to save from my own paychecks to buy our trailer when we moved here. That old house is the one thing I’ve been able to give you and Jess.” Tears filled her eyes as she looked to the floor. “I haven’t been a good mother, but at least you had a place to call home.”
Tears of my own welled. How could she think so little of herself as a mother? She had her struggles, and I wouldn’t say that after my dad had left, things had been easy. But she’d given us a lot more than she was taking credit for.
“Mom.” I touched her shoulder. “You were a good mother. You taught us how to love and trust. How to appreciate what we had. And how to stand on our own two feet.”
She shook her head and spoke to the floor. “No, I wasn’t.”
“Will you look at me?” She wiped her eyes before tipping them up. “I love you, Mom. There’s no one else in the world that I’d want for a mother.”
Her sad smile and pat on the arm were her ways of ending our discussion. She didn’t believe me but that was okay. I’d remind her every day that she was special until she did.
“I’ll drop the serious talk. We’ll go back to the fun day.”
“Thank you.”
Before she could turn away from me, I pulled her in for a tight hug. “And I’m buying you this shirt.”
She laughed and agreed. We shopped for a little while longer, and along with her top, I bought myself a few pairs of jeans. Ranch work, I had learned, was not easy on denim. After checking out and waving good-bye to the store owner, I met Mom at the window of the boutique.
“Ready to go? Maybe we could get a coffee. I could use some caffeine.”
She didn’t answer, just kept
staring out the window at Main Street.
“Mom?” I called again but she didn’t move.
Goddamn it. I had hoped that the medicine she was on would prevent these moments and it seemed to have been helping. Just not today.
“Mom?” I gently shook her shoulder.
Okay, weird.
This felt different. She was blinking and seemed to hear me. This didn’t feel like her spacey episodes. This felt like she was ignoring me.
Why, I had no clue, but I didn’t ask. Maybe she was annoyed that I’d forced her to tell that story about Dad.
Since we weren’t in a rush, I stood at her side and glanced outside, people watching safely behind the storefront glass. The street was full of people enjoying the beautiful May weather. I was actually surprised at how busy Main Street was, given that it was a Sunday and only half the businesses were open. Tourist season seemed to be starting off early and with force.
“Mom?” I asked again. “Are you ready?”
She smiled and turned my way. “Yes. Let’s go.”
“Would you like a coffee?”
Glancing over my shoulder at the clock, she shook her head. “No, thanks.”
“Oh, okay. Do you have somewhere to be?”
“Oh, no. I, um, just feel like going the other way this afternoon. How about we walk down to the hardware store?”
I shrugged. “Sure. I could use another pair of leather gloves.” The ones Silas had given me for Christmas were nearly worn out and I wanted some without lining for the hot summer days.
As we meandered slowly down the sidewalk, I heard a woman whisper, “There she is.”
Who, me?
I looked over my shoulder toward the voice. An older woman ducked her head and avoided my eyes. I had no idea who she was. Weird. I kept walking but slowed when every person we passed kept staring at me.
