Page 46 of The Clover Chapel (Jamison Valley 2)
I took a deep breath and summoned all of my willpower to keep from walking into the space between her legs and taking her mouth. Someday soon I was going to have her again. She would be right here in the kitchen, in that exact position, moaning my name.
“Where did you learn to cook?” she asked.
“Mostly from experimenting on my own. After Mom died, Dad tried to cook for my brother and me but his food was shit. He gave up and would just take us to McDonald’s or Taco Bell. I got sick of eating fast food so I started to mess around in the kitchen. I wasn’t good at it at first but then I started to get the hang of it.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. Other than Mom not being there, I enjoyed it.” I went to the fridge and grabbed one of the beers I’d brought over. “Where’d you run off to?”
“I decided to go see my mom last minute,” she said. “Wait. How did you know I was gone?”
“I came by to give you your Christmas present and saw you’d left. I checked on the house a couple of times while you were gone.”
“Oh. You didn’t need to do that, but thank you. You really got me a Christmas gift?” she asked.
“Isn’t it customary to buy your spouse a present? Does that mean you didn’t get me anything?” I feigned surprise.
“You are not funny.”
I smiled. “You say that now, but just wait until you get my present.”
I’d gotten her a coffee mug for her collection. I thought it was hilarious and hoped she’d like it too. But now, after seeing the insides of her kitchen cabinets, I was concerned that she already had it.
“I thought you said your mom lived in Italy. Is that where you went?”
“She does. And yes, they live in Milan but usually spend the holidays at a resort on Lake Como. I spent a couple weeks with her and Alesso there.”
“I’m glad you could go see her.”
“Me too. What did you do?”
“Nothing much. Took a few days off work. Spent some time chopping firewood. Read a book.”
“You didn’t go anywhere for Christmas?” she asked.
“I did. I came here.”
Her shoulders fell. “Sorry. I just needed some time away.”
I walked from the island to stand at her side and leaned down into her face, gently taking hold of her chin. “I get that, Emmy. But no more running away. I told you I’m not letting you go, so you need to get used to having me in your life. Every day. No more space.”
“I am not ready. I just ended a five-year relationship.”
“Get ready,” I said. “I thought about you every day for nine years, wondered what you were doing. I had questions I wanted to ask but couldn’t. Those nine years are on me. It was my mistake to walk away from you but I’m not doing it again. And I won’t let you do it either. All I’m asking for is time. I’ll prove to you that you can trust me again.”
“I can’t promise to forgive you, Nick. It still hurts.”
The pain behind her words was like a punch to the gut.
I was such a fucking asshole.
“I don’t need a promise. Just a chance to erase that pain,” I said and leaned all the way down to brush my lips across hers. She was frozen stiff but that didn’t stop me from keeping my lips against hers for a few perfect seconds.
When I leaned back, tears glistened in her eyes.
“Don’t cry, my sweet Emmy.”
She sniffled and blinked away the tears. “Can we change the subject?”
