Page 124 of The Coppersmith Farmhouse (Jamison Valley 1)
The second the word left my lips, he drove his hips forward hard and buried his cock to the hilt.
I moaned into his neck as my head jerked up and collided with his shoulder. I kept moaning as he fucked me just like he said he would: hard and deep. His hands moved roughly over my body as his cock thrust in and out with no restraint.
My legs started to tremble behind his back and a rush of heat poured over me as I came hard and fast.
“Fuck. So fuckin’ tight. Missed your pussy, baby,” Jess said into my ear.
He picked up his pace, pounding into me, over and over again.
“Jess, it’s too much,” I whispered.
“Take it, Georgia. Just let go,” he ordered, not slowing down.
I blanked my mind and let go, coming again so powerfully my body split in two.
“Fuck,” Jess groaned into my hair as he let go too. I felt his release hot inside me. He planted his cock deep to keep our connection after he finished coming.
With his weight on top of mine, I let my hands wander across his muscled back. I had missed him so much this last month, missed feeling his heavy weight on top of me, like he was keeping me anchored to him. Anchored to us.
And I’d missed feeling his body linked with mine. Even though what we’d just had was fucking, pure and simple, it was also him making love to me. Showing me with his hands, his mouth and his cock that I was his love.
My hands wandered up and down his back and then down his sides. My fingers froze when they hit his scar. I couldn’t see it but I didn’t need to. I knew exactly what it looked like. It was rough and jagged. The skin was still raised and hot pink.
I traced the line where his stitches had been just three days ago, lightly going back and forth over the mark on his beautiful back. A mark he would have forever. A reminder that he’d almost lost his life and that I had almost lost him in mine.
My chin quivered. Time was up. There was no keeping my breakdown at bay any longer. Jess wouldn’t need to coax it out of me because it was already pouring out through the tears in my eyes.
“Let it go, baby.” He rolled onto his back, pulling me on top of him.
“I almost lost you,” I sobbed into his neck. “All I can see is the blood, Jess. I can’t stop seeing it. Seeing you on that stretcher with blood dripping to the floor. Seeing Dr. Peterson restart your heart, your body jolting off the stretcher when he shocked you. I can’t stop seeing it.”
He didn’t say anything. He just wrapped his arms around my back and held me tight.
“What if that happens again? What would we do if it were worse? I don’t know if I can survive it. Losing you. I don’t want to be like Ben. Wandering around, living a life without a life. I am so scared it’s paralyzing me. If I don’t keep myself distracted and exhausted, it comes back. I just can’t stop seeing it and wondering when it will happen again.”
“Baby, you can’t think like that,” Jess whispered.
“You weren’t there, Jess. You didn’t see it.
See how bad it was.”
“I wish it hadn’t happened, that you hadn’t been there. But it did and you were. We have to move past it. Get back to where we were. You gotta reengage with us. Stop pulling away from me.”
“I don’t know how,” I whispered.
“Yes you do,” he said, giving me a little shake. “All you gotta do is let me in there. Let me show you the way out so we don’t live a life in fear, scared that with every move it’ll be over. It could happen again, Georgia. You know that. None of us know when it’s our time.”
I nodded.
He was absolutely right. And it wasn’t like I hadn’t known it before. Lives could be cut short, but that didn’t mean it still wasn’t terrifying.
“I don’t want to lose you. All my life I’ve been losing people. My dad before I even got to know him. My mom way before it was time. Ben. And I survived all of those. Somehow I made it through. And each time, I knew I was strong enough to make it. But I don’t know if I could survive if I lost you, Jess. I don’t think I’m strong enough,” I said quietly.
“You’re stronger than any person, man or woman, I’ve ever known, Georgia. I don’t want you to have to survive me but if you have to, you’ll do it. Because you’ll have to for Rowen. And I want you to be happy, even if I’m not here to share that with you.”
His words brought on a whole new batch of tears. I hated to think of life without him. I wouldn’t be happy, I couldn’t be, if he wasn’t here.
“But it’s not gonna happen,” he said. “I’m okay. Gonna be okay. We’re gonna live it good while we can. And my living it good is with you. With Roe. We finally get to be happy. So I need you to be with me, not letting your fears drive you away.”
