Page 1 of Storm
Prologue
They say,
What’s broken can be mended. What’s ripped can be stitched.
I wonder when my heart glues back; will it beat the same way for you, as Soil beats for Rain...Sea beats for Shore?
Will it feel the same way for you, as Light feels for Darkness...Earth feels for Heaven?
Will the Storm wait for Lightening?
Or is it too late...?
1-Silenced heartbeat
Aariz
One year ago-
I am dead, but not gone. Yet I feel...‘Dead’. I wonder how one feels dead, although being alive and breathing. It might be as I am not living, not really anyway.
This feeling of being dead comes in moments to me. Like there are bouts of feeling nothing at all. It is mostly when I try to let go of my emotions, try to feel the loss that it happens...I stop feeling. I get numb. I get dead.
Stepping out of the elevator, I was about to enter my apartment with grocery bags, when the memories came back, making me want to throw things off my hands. Anything to forget those feelings, vanish those reminders. Because the pain they brought along, was unbearable.
But I could not afford to breakdown. I had to be the responsible adult here. I had to get over it and move on. Therefore, I did. I opened the front door and went inside.
We lived in the not-so-loud part of Los Angeles city. It used to be my parents’ place, as they loved the quiet. I, on the other hand, stayed in a small bachelor’s pad in the heart of the city, which was closer to my workplace. Now, since more than a year, I had moved into this apartment.
“Aariz, you’re back!” Granny turned around with a warm smile, which reached her sparkling grey eyes, as I dumped the bags on the white marble counter top.
She hastily rubbed her hands on the light pink apron around her waist, and exhaled, as if she had been holding on to a deep nervous breath.
Did she doubt I would not come?
She probably heard me the moment I entered through the front door, as we had an open-floor plan, connecting the kitchen and living room.
“Oh you brought my medicines as well, though I hadn’t even asked.” My Gran, Mrs Haya Deewan, gave me a tender look with her loving smile on, as she went through the bags.
So what if I had bought her medicines on the off chance that she might be out of stock? It did not mean progress or anything. I was still cold, and my heart...silent. Silenced by the hell I had been through...was going through.
Nodding at her, I turned to leave.
“Honey, would you like some coffee? Or maybe I make you something to eat?” She asked from behind me in a hopeful voice.
I just shrugged and shook my head.
My Grandmother’s smiles were getting warmer with passing days; as if she thought, my coldness would melt away in them. I did not believe it would help.
She had been worrying over my food intake since a long time. It was not as if I wanted to starve myself. Just the things like food and hunger had become non-priorities for me. I did not feel the urge for the things I loved. Yet, Gran thought if I went back to loving food, I would be jolly...happy again. I knew it’d never happen so easily. Maybe she knew that too. But, it was her maternal instinct to try what she could do best.
I was not being numb on purpose though. Life had done that to me. From more than a year, I was secluded in my own world, where I had no wish to be. I felt lonely and yet, I could not find an escape.
I locked my bedroom door behind me. There was just one thing keeping me sane. One memory, I never wanted to forget or run from. One person, I wished I could have had.
Removing the paper from its safekeeping, I read it as I had a million times before. And like always, my face automatically split into a smile, which was quite rare for me. The muscles felt wierd stretching into a smile. Yet, I smiled. I always did when I read that paper.
Six months ago-
“It had been raining since forever, and now finally it has stopped.” Gran chattered merrily as she entered my bedroom, picking up the discarded clothes and things on her way.
I was on the phone, speaking to the one friend who had my back through this storm.
‘You must come back. Start anew here.’ He insisted as always.
‘I'm considering it.’ I finally said what he wanted to hear.
‘Great!’ He cheered, and I could feel him beaming on the other end.
He continued,
‘The way you have turned your life around, came out of depression all on your own...You deserve a change. A fresh start.’
With a smile in his voice, he added softly,
‘Also, here she...’
‘I know. That is one of the reasons I’m coming.’ I closed my eyes on reflex, and a serene smile appeared on my face.
I hung-up the phone, but the smile stayed.
Gran came to sit in front of me by the window,
“Aariz, the weather has turned so refreshing and humid. Just the way you always loved. Would you like some fries to eat, while we enjoy this weather?”
“Don't bother Gran. Just sit.” I clasped her hand, smiling at her lovely aged round face, which had worry lines all over it.
