Page 86 of Combust (Everyday Heroes 2)
The emotions are under lockdown.
You’ve tattooed my soul.
The future is nonexistent.
The fate of my heart yours to control.
And yet, he’s the one I’m thinking of right now, not Jett. It’s his kiss I want to taste, not Jett’s. It’s his bed I want to crawl into, his scent I want to smell on the pillowcase when I’m tired and an emotional wreck.
Not Jett’s.
“He’s a rebound, Dylan. I’m the real thing, standing here in front of you. Wanting you.”
His words strike my ears, but it’s Grady’s from the other night that still ring true. His honesty. His anger. His truths.
“No. You aren’t what I want anymore. I used to wait for you. Want you. Need you. But after what you did to me, and the things that Grady has taught me about myself, it no longer holds true.” I look around the room, needing an escape, a moment, anything to gain physical distance from him. “We’re over, Jett. We’re done.”
I look at him one last time before I leave the studio, feeling strength when I never had it before. I’m not going to be a victim, someone whose worth is determined by what a man feels about me.
Then I think of Grady and know I’m not quite there in terms of confidence. I think it will take me a while to believe the things he said about me. Beautiful. Wanted. The things wet dreams are made of. The woman I keep thinking about, keep wanting more from. I feel a different form of vulnerable.
The first is a welcome change; the second scares the shit out of me. If Jett is right about anything, it’s that Grady is a rebound and rebounds never last. I lean against the wall outside the studio and rest my head against it.
It’s fine. I’m fine. Grady being a rebound is perfectly okay because I’m going to be back here full-time in a few weeks anyway. It’s probably best this way. I can enjoy what I have with Grady while it lasts and then walk away better for it and thankful he helped me get over Jett.
“The fact that you’re out here eating dinner should worry me, right?” Kai asks through a laugh. I look up from where I sit, my back against the building’s brick wall, and my senses soaking up everything so perfectly Los Angeles around us. The distinct sounds of people getting to where they need to be in horns and sirens and laughter. The warm night air that’s stifling, when in Sunnyville it always seemed refreshing.
“Am I that bad?”
“Nah. You are a perfectionist. There’s nothing wrong with that. And you’re exceptional at what you do, so you’re forgiven for being a pain in the ass.”
“Thanks a lot.”
“Your version of pain in the ass is nothing compared to that pain in the ass,” Kai says as he lifts his chin to the studio where Jett is.
“Talent never overrides tact, huh?” I say when I’ve turned a blind eye to Jett’s stunts for so long.
“Never.” He shoves his hands in his pockets. “Thanks for coming out on such short notice.”
“I promised I’d be here.”
“Yeah, I’m pretty sure Callum and the other execs weren’t feeling confident after Jett pulled a Jett last time we were here.”
“What was his temper tantrum over?
His laugh says it all. “The whiskey was wrong. The room was too hot. The light was too bright—same old prima donna bullshit. So much so that he waltzed out in a tizzy saying he didn’t have the right atmosphere to make music in.”
“Christ.” Will he ever grow up? How did I put up with this for so long? Why did I enable him? Because I was blinded by what I thought was love.
“They weren’t too happy when no tracks were laid down or recorded.”
“I’m sure they weren’t, but I did my part, Kai. Jett had lyrics to put vocals to. Not all of them, but a good portion, so he should be a lot further along than he is.”
“He should be . . . but he isn’t the same unless you’re here.”
I’m sick of hearing this.
“He’s a big boy, who’s going to have to figure out how to deal next go round. Or rather, I should say the label is going to have to figure out how to manage him. My handholding is done after this album.”
