Page 103 of Sweet Ache (Driven 6)
Hunter eyes me through the shadows, sweat beads on my forehead, and my heart hammers in my ears. I wonder if I’m overreacting, telling myself that I am, but deep down I know that Hunter is going to do just what Hawke has warned me of: Take what is Hawkin’s at all costs.
I begin to scoot myself into the corner of the couch, trying to contain the panic bubbling up inside, but my feet slip as I try to gain traction. Hunter’s hand flashes out to grab my ankle before I can fully find my footing and yanks me back down the length of the couch.
He knows that I know.
The reaction is instantaneous, the fight-or-flight instinct so ingrained it’s not even a thought as I try to scramble away from him. My free leg kicks out wildly, trying to connect and at the same time prevent itself from being pinned captive like my other leg. My pulse is pounding erratically, the blood rushing through my veins sounds like a freight train bearing down on me.
The sob falls from my mouth, and I almost can’t believe that a man made of the same flesh and blood as the one that I love could be about to do this to me. I’m so scared and panicked that I don’t even have a second to think through the truth that this whole situation has just squeezed loose from the depths of my heart. That I’m in love with Hawkin Play.
His amused and nonchalant laugh hits me like a punch as I use every ounce of strength I have to try to gain freedom: writhing, attempting to flip over and off the couch so he’s forced to release my ankle, kicking, punching. Nothing works.
“Trixie,” he sneers, “I’m gonna take what I want anyway, fight or not, so why not just accept it. I’m sure you’ll enjoy it.” The calm, even tone of his voice sends chills up my spine and even though it knocks me motionless momentarily, it makes me resist harder once that second is over.
“Get off me!” I scream at the top of my lungs, fear ruling my every reaction. Sense has been lost to fear and you can’t reason with insane so all I have left is my determination and fuck if I’m going to let that fail me now.
I can hear the shouting and even though it’s my voice, I don’t remember thinking to yell. I lash out again in a fury of fists and my free foot that he’s trying to grab on to. I know if he finds purchase around that ankle I’m screwed, so I fight with every ounce of resistance in me, finding the focus needed to quiet the panic ruling my thoughts. But this time I connect somehow with his lower torso and am granted a small reprieve when he releases his grip temporarily.
I’m up in a flash, uncoordinated and all over the place. I bang my shin on the table but I don’t care. All I can think about is the front door, that there are people outside who might hear me or be able to help. I take a few steps and then his body slams into my back, him hitting me, me hitting the hallway wall face-first. My arm is wrenched behind my back, the weight of his body holding me still, my bare flesh against the chilled paint on the wall, and I try to jerk my head back and forth as his chin comes over my shoulder.
His maniacal laugh fills my ear, the tone of it telling me he is so far over the edge of reason that no matter what I do, how I reason, I won’t be able to pull him back. The thought scares the shit out of me and yet I refuse to succumb to that fate.
He grinds his body against mine, a grunt of approval as his pelvis presses against my ass. I struggle against him, earning me another laugh as we stand there body to body, both of us panting with exertion, mine mixed with fear, his mixed with excitement, and the thought sickens me.
“What’s wrong, Q? You don’t want to double your pleasure, double your fun? Every whore wants a chance at twins, right?”
I grit my teeth, reject the taste of bile that wants to evacuate from the confines of my stomach, and squeeze my eyes shut. Thoughts, prayers, pleas run through my mind, giving me something to focu
s on rather than the sickening feel of his body against mine, the smell of fear in my nostrils, and the sheen of sweat coating my skin.
Chapter 37
HAWKIN
Vince drives his truck onto the lawn and before he even has it in park, I’m sprinting to the front door of Quin’s house. The only thing I need to validate my fears is here: Hunter’s black BMW sitting in the driveway. My heartbeat is in my throat and the acrid taste of fear sears my taste buds with the tang I’ve only tasted one other time in my life.
The pent-up anxiety that has heightened with every passing mile on the way here is like a powder keg of everything in my chest waiting to explode. Her unanswered cell phone, having to call 9-1-1 because of what I fear I’m going to find, mixed with the inherent knowledge that my brother, my own flesh and blood, is the one here fucking with her. It all churns in my gut and tells me that there will be no more next time for Hunter.
Hurt me, I can deal with it. The armor I’ve used to protect myself over the years is worn but comfortable and I know its weaknesses. Harm someone I care about for no other purpose than to get to me, and the line I’ve redrawn so many damn times to excuse his actions has just been crossed and can never be erased.
I’m prepared to kick the fucking door down when I reach it, I’m so amped up on adrenaline, but the lever lowers at the press of my thumb. The door slams open and I don’t know what exactly I expect, but rage the color of blood is all I see as the glow of the porch light and Vince’s headlights illuminate the foyer hallway.
For that split second before they know I’m there, I feel like everything comes in a strobe light flash of images. Hunter’s hand fisted in Quin’s hair, yanking it back, the other trying to shove her shorts down. Quin’s hands spread against the wall as his body presses her against it. The look on my brother’s face, one I’ve never seen before—gritted teeth, muscles tense, eyes vacant—that causes chills to race up my spine. The shit from the coffee table strewn all over the floor.
I hear my yell before I even realize I’m shouting, and something snaps inside me. Fury shatters through the haze of disbelief at the same time Vince’s headlights turn off. Hunter and I collide into each other, him to flee, me to avenge. We land with a crash in the darkness, brother against brother, right versus wrong, past versus future.
My shoulder smarts from connecting against the corner of the wall, knee meeting solid muscle, fists pounding into him with a disturbingly satisfying crunch. I’m exhausted, I’m exhilarated, I’m enraged, I’m heartbroken over my brother and his continual capacity to hurt everything that I care about, everything I find myself wanting to love.
I shrug Vince’s hands off my shoulders time and again but still hear him shouting as Hunter connects with my jaw. The pain stuns me momentarily the same time as the light floods the room we’ve destroyed.
But I don’t stop. Can’t. Memories of the past and the here and now become a Molotov cocktail of emotion and I can’t stop myself from unleashing years’ worth of pent-up aggression in each action. For Quinlan. For me. For my bandmates. For my sanity.
“Hawke! Hawke!” Vince is calling my name again and for a fleeting moment I fear that if I stop, my head will quiet and I’ll be forced to face whatever Hunter’s done to Quinlan.
And I don’t think I can handle it. Can’t face it. Because if it’s what I fear deep in my soul, I don’t think I’ll be able to live with myself. The one real, pure thing I’ve had in my life and he’s damaged her too so that every time I look at her, touch her, I’ll have to think of him.
That is if she can stand to look at me, handle me touching her again and not remember my brother.
He lands another punch but it doesn’t faze me because I’m so focused on turning the hatred he’s had for so long back onto him. And because I’m scared. So fucking scared so it’s easier to take his pain than to deal with my own.
