Page 112 of I Will Revel in Glory (Death by Daybreak MC 3)
Only I did.
I was just too nervous to put words to those feelings; I’m not anymore.
I slide my palms up the leather of his cut, picking at the patch on the front right pocket. Sin. Road Captain.
“I would take you,” I tell him, staring at his chest instead of his face. My gaze moves up to the small bandage on his neck. It’s more like a large Band-Aid now than a proper bandage which is nice. Time flows, whether we like it or not, and it heals wounds that seem like they’ll be forever bleeding. Some of them scar. My sisters, Sin’s sister. Those ones leave marks like the jagged lines on my legs, but even though they’re never gone, they don’t throb with a mind-shattering insistence. But every now and again, every once in a while … I exhale and make myself meet his gaze. “I would take you and Grainger and Beast and Crown.”
Sin’s mouth lifts up in that perfectly imperfect smile of his, the scar on his lip making me think of his story and his sister and his mother who named her daughter ‘heavenly child’. She left Hawaii to be with a monster of a man who ruined her life. Who ruined her children’s lives. I didn’t want to be a woman like that, who made a huge mistake in the name of love.
But I’m not.
I’m strong.
I’m not saying I won’t weather storms, that I won’t fight for my romance, but I also won’t let it destroy me. That’s not what any of these men want. I know that. The simple fact that they stepped back and left me alone for nearly two years, to give me time to think and grow away from their influence, that matters.
“Oddly enough, when I thought about it, I could also see taking my daughter with me. Showing her how to ride. Letting her know that she can get whatever she wants out of life if she’s willing to fight for it.”
Sin sighs heavily, putting his hands on my hips and making my skin ripple with fire. I love when he touches me that way, almost reverently, like he’s had a dream of his come true and is afraid to wake up, just in case.
“What if we have a boy?” Sin queries, and I snort.
“I don’t want a boy,” I mutter, and he laughs, pulling me into his arms and pressing his sharp mouth to my hair. It doesn’t matter where he kisses me or how he does it, it always shifts my world around, makes me rethink things, makes me believe in shit that’s only true in fairy tales.
“Well, if such an unfortunate circumstance were to befall us, what would you do then?”
I sigh and let myself relax into the circle of his arms, feeling my skin get hot and knowing that for me, at least, a moment like this is more intimate than sex. Being held, being hugged, it triggers all of my emotional issues, snaps my boundaries, makes me feel vulnerable in a way I’m not used to.
“I guess he could come, but he’d have to ride bitch seat on the back of my bike.”
Sin laughs at that, a full-body chuckle that stirs my hair as he draws away from me so that he can look down and meet my eyes.
“Even if I feel sorry for this possible future son, I like your answer. I don’t want you to feel trapped here, Gidge.”
“I don’t,” I promise, because it’s true. If I did, I would leave. I had the opportunity before, with Grey. I could’ve married him and chosen a different life. Then, after the club rescued me, I could’ve taken Crown’s offer up to smuggle me off the compound. “I want to be here.”
“Good. Because I want you here, too.” He studies my face as I look up at him. “You know, we do actually need baby things. Cribs and strollers and clothes and shit. Maybe a bagger with extra cargo room to stuff the baby in during long rides.”
I chuckle at that. A bagger is a large motorcycle meant for long-haul trips.
“You’re right. I almost forgot that babies, like, need things.” I think on that idea for a second. I guess we’re all going to live in Crown’s farmhouse? We haven’t exactly worked out the specific details of our living arrangements, but I know that these men won’t want to be separated from their child. Beast considers it his already, and the others won’t know who, exactly, is the biological father. They’ll all want to be there.
So we’ll have to be together.
I decide not to bring that up just yet.
“I’m assuming the wives will throw you a shower eventually?” Sin queries, and I cringe outwardly. Gross. A baby shower with all the other club wives? I mean … that is club culture right there in a nutshell. It’ll be a huge affair, and by the end of it, I’ll have everything I ever needed for a baby. I don’t even have to worry about it. The other women will shower me with gifts galore.
