Page 108 of I Will Revel in Glory (Death by Daybreak MC 3)
He takes off, and even though I know I might hate myself for this later, that my father hurts people and hurts dogs and hurts his own kids, I do it anyway. I just do it.
“I love you,” I tell him, and he stops. He actually stops walking. “I don’t want to. I even hate myself for it. But there it is. It’s out there.” I spread my arms wide, opening myself up to the storm, the darkness, the smoke-filled sky. When Cat doesn’t answer, when he just keeps walking, I let my head fall back and my lids droop closed.
I stay that way until I feel them, all four of them, standing nearby. My own horde of demons, granting me the armor that I need to defend myself against the devil.
“Well?” It’s Crown, that one word a demand. I drop my arms by my sides, but I don’t move any more than that.
“He wants me to report back when I hear from Grey,” I whisper, tasting the strange charcoal-tainted raindrops on my mouth. I stick my tongue out to catch more of the stray droplets, and a strange laugh escapes my throat. It’s husky and sardonic, but not entirely displeased.
I should be broken over what happened last night.
Instead, all I can think is how much better I would’ve handled it if I were in charge.
I could’ve saved Ms. Briggs then, couldn’t I?
I open my eyes and lift my head. Sin has a slight smile on his face while Crown is frowning in disturbed consternation; Beast is still and silent, but his eyes simmer, and Grainger, well, he scowls at me just like he always does.
It matches up, those reactions, to what I already know about them all.
Sin is just enough of the boy next door to wake up parts of me that I thought I lost, that really, I thought were dead, that childhood I’m chasing so hard and watching slip further and further away. We can be young together, me and him, but without falling into a trap of complacency or naivety.
With Crown, I feel like a true partner, a queen to his king, someone that can both give and receive advice. He’s the perfect type of man to own a house with, to make a baby with. That’s his forte, a strong pillar, a natural-born leader.
Beast is the one who treats me like something that’s deeply cherished, something to be taken care of, something to treasure. He’s leashed himself to me, and his blood runs on the beat of my heart rather than his own. He will lie down and die for me if that’s what’s needed, and he’ll do it without complaint.
Grainger … oh, fuck Cade Grainger. He’s the one I really wasn’t supposed to want, the toxic passion, the one that makes me burn up on the inside and not care that I’m reduced to ash, that I’ve mixed in with the electricity of the wind and I’m becoming the storm.
There are so many sides of me, and each man matches up perfectly to one of those jagged edges. I look around at them, and then refocus my gaze on the cottonwood tree.
“Just give me some time, and I’ll restore your honor in the club.” I strut off, that statement hanging in the air behind me.
Cat isn’t going to let Reba off the compound just yet. And if I learned anything from this conversation, it’s this: we need to tread very, very carefully. Play by the rules.
At least for now.
I’m bent over the toilet bowl, forearms resting on the seat, and cursing Nellie under my breath. I was fine until she brought up this shit. It’s like, psychosomatic or something, I swear. Fucking pregnancy symptoms.
My stomach muscles contract, and I dry heave over the water, wondering why the hell I would ever choose this path for myself. You really are nuts, Gidge. You’re insane. I can’t even blame the guys for this really; this was a decision made with my own free will.
Sin moves into the bathroom to squat beside me. He’s absurdly handsome in his leather cut, a black t-shirt underneath, criminally snug denim on his strong thighs, and black riding boots. That blue hair of his is styled perfectly, his earrings shimmering in the light. Worst of all, that gleam of pride in his silver eyes.
“Get the hell away from me,” I growl out at him, but he just laughs, this naughty chuckle that makes me want to stab him. How dare he turn me on when I’m bent over the toilet like this? I take it he’s also smug because I spent the night in his room last night. More importantly, I let him fuck me with his hand and that stupid vibrator, and I practically begged him to slide into me while I was coming with strong, violent contractions.
