Page 2 of Wild (Chicago Underground 4)
Distantly I heard Dawn make another pitch for me, a complaint about the guys working here being lazy bums and how she really needed another girl to commiserate with. I wanted to say something, to put a stop to the train that was about to crash into me, but the air was too thin—I couldn’t speak. I couldn’t breathe.
Frowning slightly, he took the application and scanned it. I saw when he passed the work history section; his gaze skittered back up. His mouth opened, snapped shut. If he had already suspected, he’d definitely figured it out now. My stomach hollowed out.
He stared at the paper, clearly unseeing—frozen like me. The last time I had seen him, he’d been lounging naked on white sheets, his skin flushed and sweat-dampened as he’d handed me a nice tip from his wallet. Now both of us were trapped in this moment by our sins and by Dawn’s hopeful expression.
“Um, boss?” she said. “Remember you were just saying how much we needed someone.”
She laughed, but we must have been giving it away, because the sound was thin.
“I figure she’s gotta be better than Damion. He wiped his nose on the books.”
Jason remained silent—damnably so. Yes, the quiet said. She’s worse than you know, worse than the guy who put snot on books. His lips worked, closing around empty air. The silence stretched, bottomed out. And then I started to pity him.
He had dipped his toe into the dark pool of Chicago’s underworld. Paid-for sex with a pretty girl and a strap-on was par for the course in my world, but he’d probably sweated the morality—and possibly the cost—for a long time after. I was the one out of my element. I was the one who didn’t belong here.
It was time to leave.
“I probably should mention that I have a busy schedule,” I said.
“What?” He blinked at me with those puppy-dog brown eyes, the pleading look that once had words attached to them: “Please, spank my ass. Harder, harder.”
I sighed. “I have a life, you know. So I don’t want to work weekends, and I need to be out of here by five on the weekdays.”
Understanding lit his eyes—and gratitude. “I’m afraid weekends are required for this position. Lots of them.”
I snorted. “Good luck if you expect me to show up.”
Dawn’s mouth hung open. Maybe I was laying it on too thick.
“Look,” I said. “I thought this might work out, but…I see now that it won’t. Sorry to waste your time.” I snatched the application from the hands of a very relieved Jason.
On my way to the door, I heard Dawn’s scandalized whisper. “What’s wrong with her?”
Dark curiosity slowed my step.
“No wonder she doesn’t have a job,” I heard Jason say. “She’s probably on drugs.”
Outside I threw the crumpled application into a trash can. Hell, if sweetly rebellious Dawn thought I was a stoner, so what? Better that than the truth. Those years hadn’t been empty. They’d been full of things not to discuss in polite company. Nothing to qualify me for participating in the real world. He was right not to hire me. Why did I even care?
Chapter Two
Back in the car, I looked at my phone and flipped to the number I never called. My thumb hovered over the Call button. If I told him I had tried to get a real job, would he laugh? No, but he’d pity me when he learned why I failed.
I put the phone down and drove home.
In the lobby of my apartment building, the doorman Evan sat behind the security desk, looking spiffy in his uniform. He always broke my heart just to look at him, perpetually deflated. He needed a sweet-faced woman to dote on him, to do dirty things to his skinny body and fill him up with pride. He brightened when he saw me.
“Hi there, Shelly.”
“Hey, Ev. How’s the view?” I could have been talking about the city vista through the large bay windows. But I knew he would check me out. And he did.
“It’s great.” He blushed. “I mean good. How are you?”
I’ve been bad, Mr. Thomas. You should punish me. Today, the script hovered on the tip of my tongue. “A rough day,” I said.
Concern lit his face. “Can I do something to help?”
I could imagine it. I would ask for a hug and then wriggle closer, put my breath against his neck and my breasts against his chest. Then he’d be in the back office with his pants around his ankles, having an afternoon he would never forget.
