I make myself look at Chasm, trying to pull some rational thoughts together behind the haze of my panic.
“The authorities discovered two bodies …” I start, and Chasm’s eyes go wide. He sits down hard on his ass, our feet tangled together. His in sneakers, mine bare. “A male and a female. Tess and Paul went to … see if they could identify the boy.”
Chasm says nothing, he stares at nothing, but his eyes aren’t blank. Instead, I see gears and cogs moving, turning, rationalizing, puzzling, observing, analyzing. He’s so goddamn smart, it’s remarkable. He looks up at me.
“He can’t be dead,” he says to me, and not just like it’s a wish, a hope, or a prayer, but like he’s actually figuring something out. I scoot a little closer to him and we put our foreheads together. “Because his kidnapper picked him or a reason, right? Because he knew you’d fight for him. Well, he hasn’t even started with you yet. You didn’t even kill the goddamn bunny. What do you think the endgame is here? He’s going to want you to kill people.”
“Don’t say that,” I choke out because if there’s one thing I might not be able to do to save Parrish, that’d be it. I guess … it depends on who he asked me to kill. Chills take over my entire body, and I feel suddenly like I’m spiraling. This is exactly what the Slayer wants, to make me question everything about who I am. Everything.
“Do you think he’d really make us fuck and then not tell Parrish about it? I mean, what’s the point if we don’t all suffer?”
I think about what Chasm’s saying. I also figure that the Slayer could’ve recorded us last night, could’ve shown Parrish the video, and then killed him. And if he recorded the whole thing and then made us watch him, watching us. That’d be … that’d be the pinnacle of true evil.
Don’t let your mind go there. Just don’t. Don’t imagine terrible things before they happen.
“Little Sister, look at me,” Chasm says, but I’m staring at my toes, my mind spinning wildly. He reaches out and takes my face between his hands, forcing me to meet his eyes. “Naekkeo,” he adds, stroking his thumbs along the sides of my jaw. “He isn’t dead. This is too … I mean, there’s no fanfare at fucking all.”
I let out a low, shaky laugh, but none of my tension leaves with it.
I want to believe Chasm, but I’m terrified. More so than I’ve ever been in my entire life.
“You’re right,” I tell him, because even if he isn’t, it doesn’t hurt to hope, right? I can’t let it hurt. I have to believe that Parrish is going to be okay so that we can continue our search. If Chasm is right, and that male body doesn’t belong to Parrish, then we’ll have wasted precious time.
How many slices to the chest can one boy handle?
I feel something cresting inside of me, like I’m on the verge of a breakthrough. I have to follow through with that.
“I … there’s a diner in this book, one that’s located in North Sultan.” Even though my voice quavers, Chasm keeps his warm hands on my face, anchoring me to this moment. His amber eyes, gods, they fucking burn. “The same town where we picked up JJ’s body from.”
“Yeah?” Chas asks, like he’s trying to follow my train of thought. “You think the diner’s important?”
“I need to ask Tess if the diner in the book is somehow related to the one we visited. If so, then maybe that’s a clue that we can use.” I reach up and place my hands over his. “Only, I can’t exactly ask her right now.”
“Do you think she’ll be able to tell right away if it’s Parrish?” Chasm asks, careful to keep any shred of uncertainty from his voice.
“I don’t know,” I whisper back.
With a huff, Chasm removes his hands from my face, standing up and pulling me along with him. He bends down to pick up the discarded book and passes it back to me.
“Keep reading,” he tells me, “and I’ll do some digging. Emerald City Murder usually has the most up-to-date information. They’ll have heard about this on the police scanner for sure.”
We settle down together in my room, but god, is it hard to focus. I read the same sentence five times over before finally grasping its meaning. With a sharp exhale, I shift into a more comfortable position and make myself keep reading. Even when tears begin to fall, staining the page, I don’t stop.
I’m not going to stop.
Parrish is going to be okay. Because he has to. Because I’ll … without him, I’ll …
I have no idea what I’ll do.
Maxx arrives home before Paul and Tess do.
