Chasm says nothing. In fact, he goes completely still; I think he might even be holding his breath.
When he finally does release it, there’s an agony in the sound that I didn’t quite expect.
I force my eyes up to meet his gaze.
“Parrish is … he’s a good person,” Chasm explains, putting his own hands in his blazer pockets and mimicking my pose. “It makes sense that you chose him. I just can’t help wanting what I want, Dakota. I don’t even give a shit that I’m second place. Somehow, that doesn’t matter.”
I shake my head violently, because I can’t allow him to believe that, not for a single second.
“He was the person I met first, that’s the only difference, the only thing standing between him and you. I care about you both the same. I realized that even before I slept with him.”
Chasm closes his eyes and lets his head fall back. My eyes are drawn to the strong column of his throat, the lip piercings on either side of his full mouth, and his hair as it catches the sunlight and glimmers blue-black. My entire chest feels tight; it hurts.
“We might be following orders, but I like it too much. That’s the problem. Not you. Not what we did. Just … Parrish.”
He drops his chin back down and opens his eyes to look at me.
“If you keep talking to me like that, Dakota Banks, I’m going to forget that this is all for show.”
Chasm takes off for his car, and I follow along.
“What the hell was that all about?” Kimber asks as I climb in, and Chasm readjusts his seat.
“It was Lumen,” I say, and then I leave it at that. Kimber knows that I had my ass kicked. Every student in Whitehall knows. That seems to satisfy her enough to get her to leave me alone.
I check my phone again, and then stare out the window, my mind straying back to Parrish.
I promised I’d do anything to save him. At this point, I’ve gone too far to turn back now.
I’ll keep forging ahead until he’s here, and he’s holding me, and then I can tell him everything that happened.
Hopefully, he can find it in his heart to forgive us.
In a strange twist of fate, I actually do start my period in the car on the way back. By the time I climb out of Chasm’s backseat, I really am bleeding down my legs.
Chas pauses, cocking his head to the side and staring at me.
“This has nothing to do with …” he whispers, trailing off. I give him a very dark sort of look.
“Coincidence.”
At the very least, when I walk inside and Tess appears to confront me, she looks down at the redness on my pale legs and blushes profusely.
“Oh goodness,” she breathes, and then her eyes flick to Chasm. He keeps his gaze steadfastly focused on anything but me. “You should get upstairs and clean up.” Tess gives a soft smile, directing the expression Chasm’s way. “I’m so sorry, Chasm. I know how boys feel about periods.”
My eye twitches, but I’m not in the mood for a feminist rant right now.
“Oh, it’s so icky,” Chasm drawls, and I clench my jaw. I’m going to punch him in the balls later, mark my words. I take off up the stairs as quickly as I can, in such a hurry that I actually slam right into Maxx. He steadies me with those big, calloused hands on my shoulders, his gaze drifting down immediately to the blood that even now is dripping on the floor.
“Oh shit,” he says, and I groan, pushing past him and locking myself in my bathroom to clean up.
This is … well, it’s a fantastic sort of day. Not only did I cheat on my kidnapped boyfriend, but I also managed to include Chasm and Maxx in the ‘hot guys I’m crushing on who’ve seen my period’ list.
Even though it’s a totally normal process that every girl has to go through, it doesn’t mean I enjoy having them watch me bleed all over the floor.
I wash up, insert a tampon, and then change into sweats and a tank top, fetching a roll of paper towels from under the sink before heading out to clean up the blood. Chasm and Maxx are both waiting for me, sitting on the edge of my bed together.
What a pair they make.
My heart skips strangely, and my breath catches. It’s not a usual sight, to see two Instagram model worthy boys cuddled up on one’s bed. If only Parrish were here, I’d probably suffer a heart attack and die.
“I cleaned it up already,” Chasm offers casually, tilting his head to one side as I stand there with the paper towels in hand. My heart starts up again, but the beats are coming much more quickly than they should, almost frantic. That feeling of free-falling sweeps over me again.
