Looking at my bio mom’s face right now, I can see why. She has dark circles under her eyes and a deep-set frown that translates to the rest of her body in the form of tight shoulders and clenched hands.
“Justin will be here shortly,” she says, voice clipped. Her eyes dart to the side as I step forward, desperate to keep her attention on me and not on the commotion outside the gate. I need X to deal with my sister before Tess realizes she’s out there. Not only has the Slayer forbid me from my sister, so has Tess.
Like, I’m in huge fucking trouble here if either of them finds out about this.
Oh, Maxine. I love that you came for me. I love that you believe in me, that your trust is endless and implicit. But I don’t deserve it. I don’t deserve you at all. I miss you though. Oh fuck, how I miss you.
“Okay,” I reply lamely, struggling to split my attention between two crappy situations. I know what Tess is waiting for: she wants me to protest. To beg her to keep that man away from me. She opened her heart to me last night and all I did was ask stupid questions about her and Justin’s special places. God. I’m breaking apart on the inside. I need to be grounded; I need to feel like Dakota Banks again.
I close my eyes for a minute, wishing that I were back at home in my old room, with grandpa cooking dinner and grandma in her woodshop, Maxine chatting to her friends via video chat. I’d start the night playing games with my headphones on, but then I’d feel that familiar need to be with my family. I’d slip one side of my headphones off, just to hear them. Then the other. Eventually, I’d pry myself away from my game and the four of us would end up at the small table in the kitchen together. Maybe I’d be playing a game on my phone absentmindedly. Maybe Maxine would be texting her best friends. But we’d all be together.
I open my eyes again to find that Tess is still staring at me, waiting, I think, for me to say something. Anything at all.
“I’m ready to go,” is all that I can manage to get out.
Tess’ face tightens up even further, and she gives a curt nod, her eyes flicking over to Delphine.
“If you’ll excuse us a moment,” she says, her voice ice-cold. Delphine scrambles to pick up her plastic tote full of cleaning supplies and scurries out of the room, head low as she passes Tess, angling her body so as not to even brush against the woman’s arm. “Dakota,” she begins as I flick a quick glance behind me, desperate to see what’s happening between my sister and … X.
Last night’s sweaty memories come tumbling through my brain even as I look down to see Maxine throwing her arms around his neck. All sorts of crazy things happen inside of me, feelings that I don’t want, that I can’t control. I’ve been saying this whole time that I can’t control those feelings, that I can only control my actions.
And look at my actions last night.
I hate you, Justin Prior. I’m going to fucking kill you.
The vehemence that hits me with that thought is terrifying, both hot and cold all at once. It makes me sick. It makes me feel like an entirely different person. All along, this has been his goal, hasn’t it? Break me down. Test my limits. Reshape me.
Well, it’s working. It is, and I can’t stand the thought of that.
I need to rally. I need to pull myself together.
I force my attention away from the pair of them—even as I see X push my sister back as gently as he can—and make myself meet Tess’ eyes.
“If anything happens when you’re with him, I need you to call the police and then call me. Can you do that for me?” Tess’ face is impassive, bordering on cold, but her voice is thickened with emotion. “He isn’t going to be the perfect father he pretends to be. I know I haven’t made things easy on you. I’ve always … I’m a selfish person, Dakota. For that, I’m sorry. Just know that Justin isn’t going to be the fairy godmother that makes things easier on you.”
Is she trying to give me a rousing speech? A pep talk? Reassure me? Piss me off? I can’t decide. All of the above, maybe.
“Um.” I shift slightly, reaching up to push my hair back from my face. “I never thought that.”
“Yes, well. All I’m saying is, be careful with him. He starts off strong. He’ll love bomb you. He’ll make you feel like you’re his everything, the center of his world, lavish you with affection and gifts. Then he’ll turn. A tiger doesn’t change its stripes.” Tess sighs heavily and reaches up to rub at her temples. “I’ve been on the phone with my lawyer all day. She’s going to see about getting a court date set to establish permanent custody. What you say there, what you want, it will hold importance with the judge. Just … keep in mind what Justin can be like.”
