I spin around to look at him, but all that does is put us far too close together.
“How did … what did you say to her?” I ask and his face falls as he glances off to one side, the guilt I’m feeling more than apparent in his own expression. I’d give up my pinky finger to talk to my sister right now, yet I also can’t imagine how crushing that guilt would be in her presence.
“She wants to see you. She says she won’t ever give up on you. Never.” X grimaces again, and then takes a step back, turning away from me and brushing at his hair again. I can see the faintest edges of his angel wing tattoos peeking out the sides of his black tank. He glances back at me. “Maxine knows something is going on. She thinks it has to do with Tess, but still. She’s determined to ‘save you’.” He makes finger quotes and then sighs, turning away yet again and then reaching up to grab the pull on the shutters. He yanks it, flooding the room with light.
“And?” I choke out, watching as he reaches into his back pocket. There’s a glittery pink envelope there that is, like, so my sister that I nearly fall to my knees. My fingers itch to snatch it away from Maxx, just so I can look at her handwriting, so I can close my eyes and imagine her speaking the words written there.
If Justin … if he takes my proposal today, I may never see her again. It’s a distinct possibility.
“She hugged me,” he says, looking down at the letter. It’s sealed with a sticker in the shape of red lips. A kiss. A sticker kiss since she can’t give me an annoying big sister one right now. Knowing her, it’ll be a scratch and sniff sticker, too. She loves those, has since she was a little girl. We used to plaster them all over each other’s arms and then spend time sniffing ourselves and laughing.
I clamp a hand over my mouth as X glances back at me.
“She … said she was sorry for breaking up with me,” he adds, his voice so sad that it nearly breaks my heart. “That we should talk. And that’s when she hugged me.” He rips open the letter, and I cringe. He reads it quickly, eyes scanning across the page, across the pretty, loopy scrawl of her handwriting. He shudders, like the letter is too painful to bear, and then opens the closet door, just to make sure we’re still alone, I think.
Maxx closes it again and turns around.
“You know what I did? I told her that I didn’t want to see her anymore either.” He purses his lips into a flat line. “That I cheated on her with another girl.”
“No you didn’t,” I whisper back, but he nods.
“Anything less than the truth wouldn’t be fair.” He looks down at the letter again. “I told her that you knew she was at the gate and didn’t want to speak to her. That she should leave you alone unless you contacted her again. She asked if you were the girl that I cheated on her with.”
“No!” I yell back, and then I do end up sitting on the floor with my legs crossed, pressing my hands to either side of my face but careful not to cover my ears. I want to hear whatever it is that he has to say. I manage to lift my gaze up to his face as he moves over and then sits down in front of me, the letter still clutched in his hands. “You told her, didn’t you? You told her.”
“She said she doesn’t care about that. I’m just a boy, but you’re her sister,” he says with a slight smile. It fades as quickly as it came, but I’m honestly surprised he managed a pleasant expression whatsoever. I want to puke. “Let me read this to you. We’re alone. There are no cameras. The directive, remember? He said no contact. He didn’t say you couldn’t hear me read a handwritten letter that was given to me.”
“I can’t believe you told her,” I choke out, looking away from him, wondering what my sister must think of me now. I lift my thumbnail to my mouth and chew on it. Maxx reaches out and takes my hand gently in his, pushing it back into my lap. His touch wakes me up inside, stirs something deep in my soul. I wish it didn’t, but it does. There’s nothing I can do about that.
“Was it better to lie?” he asks softly, and I sense something else behind his words, something desperate, almost pleading. “I had to tell her—for both of us. Eventually, when we kick the Slayer’s ass—which we will—we can explain the situation. She may or may not forgive me, but she will absolutely forgive you. That’s what’s important.”
