Page 113 of I am Dressed in Sin (Death by Daybreak MC 2)
Oddly, the regret is both for being gone and also for coming back. It’s okay to feel opposing feelings sometimes, isn’t it?
“I also got pretty close with Grey,” she says softly, and my eyes widen.
“Did you fuck him?” I blurt, and Reba throws me this look of sheer horror. It occurs to me then that she might’ve been … Shit. I’m such an idiot.
“You’re a hot mess is what you are,” Reba murmurs, stroking Fem’s triangular ears before rising to her feet. “And of course I did not”—here she stumbles a bit—“make love to that man. That might be how your mind works, but it isn’t how mine does.” She puts her hands on her hips and looks me over.
“I’m sorry, Reba,” I say, my voice softening as I feel my usual anger fade under her emerald gaze. “I shouldn’t be asking things like that. I don’t know what you’ve been through …” I trail off, because it occurs to me then that I sound exactly like Cat.
“Because of Grey, I stand here whole and hale,” she says, nodding her chin to punctuate the phrase.
Because of Grey … well, in spite of Grey maybe. In spite of me.
“Let’s talk about something else,” Reba chokes out, turning away suddenly and closing her eyes against the memories. She saw her parents slaughtered in front of her. That’s not an easy thing to get over. Actually, it’s not something you ever get over, just a limp, a constantly bleeding wound, a missing eye that you learn to get along without. “Are you dating that man again?” she asks, though we both know I never actually dated him before.
“I’m …” The words fail me as I lift my hands up and then let them fall by my sides. I’m just so happy to see her, and so sorry for everything that’s gone down. “Engaged to Beast.”
That gives Reba serious pause. She actually turns her head like a heroine in a horror movie, too slow to be real, too disturbed.
“You’re engaged to one of them?” she asks, eyes wide. “I mean, if I had to pick one, at least he has manners. But dear god, Gidget. You’re eighteen. He’s thirty-three years old.”
That makes me smile. That’s the part of the equation she’s most worried about? The age gap bit?
“I’m embroiled in a war between two gangs, Reba,” I explain patiently. She won’t truly understand what it means that they lied for me, laid their lives and their loyalty on the line for my heroic whim. “Also, have you seen him? He could go viral on any social media platform he wanted; he’s that hot.”
She just keeps staring, and then moves over to put her arms around me. We hug each other tight in the dark, enjoying the safety and comfort of friendship. A love with no expectations and no caveats. As much as I enjoy those four men, there’s … I mean, there’s a lot to unpack. It’s far from uncomplicated.
“I’m just glad it isn’t Grainger,” she murmurs, and I decide that she’s been through enough. I’ll explain my arrangement with Beast in the morning.
Nellie fusses over Reba, but the guys aren’t particularly happy to have her here.
“She’s a liability is what she is,” Crown murmurs, standing outside and watching Reba through the kitchen window. “Another loose cannon. Another flapping tongue.”
“She’s anything but a flapping tongue,” I growl at him, and he gives me a look. “You’re just mad because her presence keeps you from getting sex.” He throws me a look that says I’m not entirely off-base with that idea.
“More like, she’s a tool that can very clearly be wielded against you. She’s a person that Gaz is interested in, that knows about Gaz. She also can’t just live on the compound with you for companionship. That isn’t how things work here, Gidge.”
I put my hand on his big arm, and he heaves a sigh. He’s very clearly a sucker for me, something that I’m surprised my all-knowing sixteen-year-old self couldn’t figure out. These guys might have zero problem mowing down a crowd of mafia wedding guests, but they certainly have a difficult time resisting little old me.
“Then take me off the compound. You all must have houses, don’t you?” I ask dryly, and Crown closes his eyes for a moment, like I’ve upset him somehow. “Cat clearly doesn’t want me at our place because, well, security reasons. But what about you? Where do you live?”
“He owns a pretty little country house, set aside for his future wife,” Grainger says, his tone mocking. Sin is gone, dealing with the mind-numbing logistics of several hundred extra bikers living on the compound. Same with Beast. But more like, he’s out hunting people. This is what I now get to deal with: Calder and Cade, at war. “There aren’t many people involved with the club who think he bought it for anyone other than you.”
