Page 83 of Feast of Sparks (Thornchapel 2)
His erection is hard and thick against mine, and he grinds it relentlessly into my body, as if already demanding his pleasure. With each roll of his hips, I’m more and more mindless, more and more his, whimpering for him. “Take me,” I say against his mouth. “Take me like you were supposed to back then.”
Auden pulls back to study me, his mouth swollen and pupils blown and one earbud still in his ear. “Are you saying I’ve earned you?”
“Yes, Auden.”
“Are you saying you’ll be mine?”
I nod, my heartbeat surely louder than the music still pouring out of the iPod. His hands move from my back to my chest and then up to my neck, where his hands make a warm collar. “Mine, St. Sebastian Martinez. Do you know what that means?”
“That you’ll have sex with me, hopefully,” I say. My desperation and short, panting breaths make me sound crankier than I am, and Auden raises an imperious brow. I suddenly feel like a thane who’s mouthed off to his king.
“No need to get shirty with me,” Auden murmurs, his eyes dipping to my mouth and the
n growing even darker. “But perhaps if we’re already going there . . .”
“Are you going to play Dominant with me now?” I ask, trying to sound casual. Forgetting that my hard-on is ridiculously evident—which he reminds me by giving me another dry thrust.
“I don’t play,” he warns me. “Either you’re mine or you’re not, Saint, you pick right now.”
Like I’d pick anything else. “My safe word is still May I,” I say, deciding that I’ll keep the one he gave me after Imbolc. I don’t mind hating my safe word because I never plan on using it.
“Say yes, Saint. Say yes to me.”
I take a deep breath. “Yes, Sir.”
Auden drags me by my shirt over to the bed. “I’m not going to fuck you today,” he tells me as he climbs on top of me.
I groan. “Why not?”
His eyes rake over me as he straddles my hips, over where my shirt has rucked up to expose my stomach. He runs wondering fingertips down the corrugations of my abs.
“I admit that I want to. I even thought about it on the way over here, thought about what it would be like to fuck you in the same bed I should have been fucking you in eight years ago.”
“Wh-what made you change your mind?” My voice is cracking because he’s just scratched his fingernails up my stomach to my nipples, where he scratches lightly again, studying my face for my reaction. “Because I think you should fuck me in this bed too.” God, just the idea of it—being fucked where I’d beat off so many nights lusting after Auden . . .
Auden doesn’t answer me. At least, not directly. To my disappointment, he moves off my hips and gets to his feet.
“I found some interesting things when I was looking through your room,” he remarks. “Some very interesting things.”
“Oh God,” I whisper. I think I’m horrified. It’s horror that’s making my hips push up into the empty air and sends one of my hands to my chest to touch where Auden was touching, right? Definitely horror.
“I was hoping to find your eyeliner,” he confesses as he crosses the room.
I’m confused for a moment. “My eyeliner?”
He gives me a crooked grin that’s both horny and fond. “Do you remember? You always used to wear it. It was so fucking sexy.”
“I can get some more,” I whisper, and he makes a purring noise that curls my toes.
Yeah, I’ll definitely be getting more if it gets me that kind of response.
Auden walks to a shelf on one of my widest bookshelves and pulls free a framed picture. It’s a picture of me at eighteen, at my high school graduation in Dallas. I picked it because at the time it seems like a normal picture to have on one’s shelf and also boring enough not to invite further scrutiny.
“This is a good hiding place,” Auden says conversationally. “But I couldn’t resist the chance to study the picture closer, and then that’s when I found them.” He reaches behind the books—yes, even at home, all my books are properly edged on the shelves, that’s how they’re supposed to be (and the fact that they make a convenient hiding spot is just a secondary bonus)—and pulls free one of my toys.
The toy itself is contained in a plastic cylinder, as if that’s supposed to make it discreet, but Auden uncaps the toy with an expression of sinister delight to expose the soft, fake cunt inside.
I cover my face with my hands; I’m ashamed, I’m so ashamed, but also so aroused that it feels like my heartbeat is coming from my erection and not my chest. Auden’s straddling me again in one graceful move, holding the toy up so that I can’t help but see it. Can’t help but see when he wedges his big fingers inside and the toy stretches around him and lets him in.
