Page 82 of Some Sort of Crazy (Happy Crazy Love 2)
“But it was perfect.” Skylar reached over and patted his leg. “And heartfelt. And I knew that he meant it.”
A look passed between them that made me so envious I wanted to throw my beer bottle against the stones beneath us just to hear it shatter. “I guess I just sort of implied it.”
“Not good enough.” Skylar shook her head. “Natalie might be strong-willed and independent, but I guarantee she still wants that question.”
“Do you love her?” Sebastian asked quietly.
“Yes,” I said without hesitation. In my mind, I saw her smile change from a playful little girl’s to a gorgeous grown woman’s. God, when had I not loved her? “I’m crazy about her. I’m just an idiot about it.”
“Does she love you?” he asked.
“She said she did last night.” I exhaled, thinking about how sweet those words had sounded on her lips. I wanted to hear them again, wanted to feel her whisper them in my ear as I slid inside her, wanted to hear it over and over again.
“She does,” Skylar said confidently. “I believe that. When she came home from Detroit, she was so weird. Just mooning around all over the place, like she was sad about something, but it definitely wasn’t the breakup.”
I frowned, slumping in my chair. “So now what? She doesn’t believe anything I tell her. And I know that’s my fault, because I once told her I was too selfish to love anyone forever.”
“Man.” Sebastian tipped up his beer and shook his head. “You are definitely your own worst enemy.”
“I know. Help,” I begged, sitting up straight again. “You guys are good at love. I am horrible. I’m only good at sex.”
“We’ve heard.” Skylar wiggled her eyebrows.
“I didn’t mean like that—I meant that when people write in and ask me about sex, I’m good with the answers. But the emotional stuff is killing me.” I ran a hand over my hair. “Not even joking, sometimes I think about her, and I can’t even breathe. It’s like I’m suffocating.”
“Yeah, that’s the feeling all right.” Sebastian nodded. “What do you say when people ask about sex?”
“Slow down. Pay attention. Give a fuck.”
He shrugged. “OK. Go with that. Go home and think, really think, about what would be meaningful to Natalie. About what she wants to hear and how she wants to hear it.”
“OK. Yeah, maybe rushing right over to her house without a plan was a mistake.”
Skylar tapped her chin. “But you have to do something big.”
I sat up straight. “That’s what my friend Nick said. A grand gesture.” I looked at Sebastian. He seemed to have all this figured out. “What did you do?”
“He got on a plane,” answered Skylar. “Which I knew he did not want to do.”
“More airplanes,” I grumbled. “Should I book a flight somewhere?”
“Not necessarily.” Sebastian leaned forward on his knees. “That was my issue, because I’m anxious about flying. I’m anxious about a lot of things, and to show her that I was willing to try to be better for her, I had to get on that plane.”
Skylar patted his leg again. “I had to drag you on that plane, honey. But you let me.” She turned to me. “You have to think of something that’s unique to you—something that would show her you mean what you say. Something that would show her you’re still the Miles she loves, but you’re also the one who loves her back enough to change.”
It hit me. “I could write about her.”
“Write about her?”
“Yes. I could use her real name,” I said, warming to the idea even more. “That’s something I’ve never done before.”
“There you go.” Skylar nodded.
“But I’m not going to propose online. I need something better.”
“Think about it. Think about her and what’s important to her. It’ll come to you.” She clapped her hands together. “And then I’ll plan your wedding!”
“Oh, Jesus.” Sebastian put up a hand. “Let’s get through ours first please.”
