Page 77 of Frenched (Frenched 1)
“I do, Mia. Come here, please.” He took my arm and led me out of the bathroom and over to the couch, where he gestured for me to sit. In addition to the flowers on the table were chocolates and a black box with a white ribbon. The box said Chanel. Holy shit. What the fuck is going on? Tucker sat next to me, but I commandeered my arm back and stuck both hands between my knees.
“Hear me out, Mia. I know you’re mad, and you have every right to be, but please give me a chance to speak.” I’d never heard this kind of pleading tone from Tucker before, but it only made me angrier.
“Why should I? I don’t want anything from you, Tucker. Not these flowers, not gifts, not an apology.” But I kept my eyes on the Chanel box. Damn if I wasn’t curious what was inside.
“I know you don’t want anything, and I don’t blame you. What I did was unforgivable. Mia, can you at least look at me?”
I refused. In fact, I crossed my arms and swiveled away from him. He sighed and got off the couch, walked around the table, and dropped to his knees at my feet. To the best of my recollection, he hadn’t been on his knees in front of me since his proposal. And there’s not even an audience here.
“I panicked.” He closed his eyes and held up his hands. “I know that’s no excuse, but it’s the truth. I panicked at the thought of such a permanent commitment, and I didn’t think I was mature enough to handle it.”
“And how long had you known you couldn’t handle it? The doubt must have been lurking there for a while, yet you waited until we had one week to go before jetting off to Vegas and leaving me, alone and humiliated, to tell everyone!” I gestured wildly in the air between us. “We could have come to this decision together, you know! I had doubts too!”
He blinked, surprise evident on his handsome face. “You did?”
“Yes, I did. But I was too caught up in planning the wedding to stop and think about them.”
“We should have just eloped. Got married on the beach in Tahiti or something.” Tucker reached out and rubbed my knee.
“What? No!” I jumped off the couch and skirted around him. “It wasn’t the wedding that was the problem. It was us—you and me. We weren’t right together, Tucker. I can see that now. And as much as it pains me to say this, you were right to call off the wedding. The way you did it sucked, but it was the right decision.”
“What if it wasn’t?” Tucker got to his feet, brushing off his charcoal pants. They looked very wrinkled for him—had he just gotten off the plane? “What if I was wrong to call it off?”
“You weren’t. God, Tucker, we weren’t even that in love! I mean, maybe we were once, but if you’re going to marry someone, you should feel like—” I stopped. I knew how a person should feel, because I was head over heels in love with Lucas.
“Like what?” Tucker asked.
“Like you can’t breathe when that person’s in the room. Like you can’t get close enough to them, no matter how hard you try. Like you’re going to burst if you can’t show that person how much you feel for them, and then you do burst—together.”
“Burst?” Tucker arched a well-groomed brow.
“Burst,” I confirmed. “It’s called an orgasm. It happens to women too, you know, and sometimes it even happens to men and women at the same time.”
“We burst.” Tucker stuck his hands on his hips and looked indignant. “We burst every time.”
“No. You burst.” I pointed at his chest. “I was lucky to get an occasional rupture, but it never happened together. It didn’t even feel like you cared.”
Tucker’s jaw protruded. “That’s not fair, Mia. I had no idea you weren’t being satisfied. You never said anything about it.”
“How could I? As soon as you were done, you went running for the bathroom to clean up!”
“Why didn’t you bring it up when we weren’t actually in bed?” Tucker’s face was actually going a little red.
Good, he should feel shame. “God, I don’t know! It just seemed like we had a routine and you were happy with it. I didn’t want to rock the boat.” I put my hands on my head. “Ugh, it doesn’t matter anyway, Tucker. It’s over.”
He reached for me, but I backed up. “Don’t say that, Mia. Let me try again. I love you, and I can do better.”
I threw my hands up and moaned to the ceiling. “No! This is so frustrating! We could have had this conversation two weeks ago, Tucker. But you left.”
“I’m sorry about that, I really am. And I came all the way here to beg you for another chance.” He even clasped his hands together. I wanted to slap him.
“When did you get here, anyway? Today?”
“Yes, about ten AM. Where were you?”
I looked him right in the eye. “I took a short trip to the country.”
He dropped his hands. “Oh. Alone?”
