Page 82 of Frenched (Frenched 1)
“I don’t know, Mia. I mean, I love you, you know I do. And I want you to have everything you’ve ever wanted. But your demands here sound a little extreme.”
“They’re not demands, they’re dreams!” Coco sounded like Lucas, and it was making me angry. “I’m allowed to have dreams.”
“Calm down, Mia. Yes, you’re allowed to have dreams. But if all that mattered about your dream was getting married and having a nice house and family, frankly you could just marry Tucker and be done with it. But I know you—you want more.”
She was right. I did want more. Chewing my bottom lip, I tried to find words to defend my point of view and couldn’t.
“Look,” she went on, “remember when we first had the crazy scheme to start our own business? We had all those ridiculous plans and imagined ourselves in a luxury penthouse office designing gala after gala for hoity-toity people with deep pockets. But it didn’t go that way, did it?”
“Not at first,” I admitted. “But what does that have to do with this?”
“Because our dream had to adjust to real life. We took any gig we could get, and we worked from your apartment, and we didn’t make any real money for a year and a half. And frankly, we didn’t know for sure if we’d ever make money—we had faith in our talent and the willingness to put in the work, but that was it. There was no promise of success.”
“But we had it all thought out,” I said, even though I was beginning to understand the connection. “We mapped out a business plan in minute detail. We had projections. I had lists! I have nothing to go on with Lucas. Nothing! That terrifies me.”
“You have everything you need to go on, Mia.” The edge was gone from her voice now. “You have your feelings, you have his willingness to try, you have fanfuckingtastic sex.”
“We do.” Just thinking about it made my blood warm.
“Well, then stop it with the projections and the fucking lists. I think he deserves a little more faith. I think you should give him a chance. After all, maybe you won’t even want to marry him after dating for a while. How can you know for certain how you’ll feel in the future?”
“God, Coco. Are you really taking his side?” I was half teasing, but she answered me seriously.
“I’m on your side, and you know it. I would never tell you to do this if I thought it wasn’t what you really wanted. But I can hear it in your voice, Mia. You want him. And there’s no reason you can’t have him. If this thing between you two turns out to be as amazing as it sounds, then you’ll find a way to make it work between you. Forget about marriage and family and just get to know each other better. Fall in love completely. Let fate take over.”
Fate again. “You really believe in that?”
“I do. Everything happens for a reason, Mia. You know I have a sense about these things, and
I’ve always felt you were supposed to be in Paris this week. I just didn’t know why until now. Go find him.”
My stomach flipped. Could I really do this? I was scared, but the thought of embarking on an unknown journey with Lucas was exciting too. Anything was possible. “OK. I will.”
She squealed in my ear. “Good girl! Call me when you can, OK? Erin’s still planning on picking you up Tuesday, so let me know if anything changes.”
“Like if I decide to move to Paris?”
“Don’t even kid about that,” she said seriously. “We have a business here to run and I’m lost without you. Get your derrière back here on Tuesday.”
We hung up, and I sat on the bed for a moment. My heart was beating way too fast. I put one hand over it and breathed in and out. A million thoughts raced through my head—I needed a plan, a list. Yes, that was it. I could still hear Coco admonishing me to stop it with the fucking lists, but they comforted me, and I needed something that felt familiar right now.
To Do List For Turning Life Upside Down
1) Accept Tucker’s apology. Say goodbye.
2) Find Lucas. Declare love.
3) Find a place to stay. (If all goes well with #1, perhaps this will take care of itself.)
4) Have sex with Lucas.
5) Do it again. Many times. For three days straight.
Locking myself in the bathroom in case Tucker decided to show up again, I showered and changed, throwing the pink sweater Lucas remembered from the cemetery over my shoulders. As my hair dried, I finished packing and went over my list again and again. Item one made me a little queasy, but items two through five put a grin on my face every time.
God, I loved lists. I’d never fucking stop.
With one last look around the suite to make sure I hadn’t forgotten anything, I pulled the door open and charged out with no regrets.
