Page 61 of From This Moment (After We Fall 4)
I laughed. How long had it been since I’d laughed in bed? A wave of affection and gratitude washed over me. Thank God he hadn’t given up on me. “Were you scared tonight? Coming here, I mean. Were you scared I’d say no?”
“Hell yes, I was scared. I had no idea what I could say that would convince you to give me a chance.”
“You did a good job.”
“Yeah?” One eyebrow cocked up.
“Yeah. And…and it was all true? What you said?”
He laughed. “You keep asking me that. I’m a terrible liar, Hannah. I promise, those things were all true.”
“You keep a good secret.”
“I had to.” He started another path down my back. “So what made you say yes?”
“Hmmm. Good question. Well, I liked what you said, obviously. But I also liked the way you said it. Somehow I knew you meant it.”
He kissed my shoulder this time. “I did.”
“And the way you looked at me. I liked that too. No one has ever looked at me that way before,” I told him.
“What way?” He seemed surprised.
“Like nothing else mattered. Like everything in your life had been leading up to that moment, and what I said would make all the difference in the world to you.” Even Drew’s proposal hadn’t felt so intense or dramatic, but maybe that was because Drew had been entirely sure I’d say yes.
He nodded slowly. “A fair assessment.”
“And it was sweet the way you said ‘let me love you,’ as if you were asking for permission.”
“I’d have loved you anyway, you know.” He focused on his fingertips, stroking down my spine again.
Chills swept over my skin. When he talked like that, his voice low and sweet, it was so easy to believe we had a chance. “I don’t want you to go.”
“I don’t want to leave.” He exhaled. “But I have to. And it’s late. You have to work in the morning.”
I tried not to be sad about reality intruding on the secret little happiness cocoon we’d created tonight, but it was hard. While he was here, it was easy to shut out the world. Once he was gone, I’d have to be alone with my thoughts. Who knew what that would be like? “Just a little while longer, okay?”
He smiled. “You know I can’t say no to you.”
I flipped onto my back and looked up at him. “Tell me we’ll be okay.”
“We’ll be okay.” He said the words, but I could see in his eyes, he wasn’t sure exactly how. How could he be? There was Abby to consider. His parents. My family. Our professional lives. Our reputations. It was easy to say we didn’t have to care what people thought, but the reality was, we did.
But not right now.
“Wes. Kiss me.”
He brought his lips to mine, a sweet, gentle kiss that was meant to be reassuring, but doubt had begun creeping into my mind. How were we going to do this? When were we ever going to see each other? I twined my arms around his neck and pulled him closer, deepening the kiss, frantic to get as much of him as I could. What if tonight was all we ever had? More than anything, I hated not knowing that I was doing something for the last time. He sensed the urgency in my body.
“Hey,” he said softly, running his hand over my hip. “It’s okay, sweetheart. This isn’t goodbye.”
“What if it is?” I searched his eyes. “What if you walk out the door tonight and…” But I couldn’t bring myself to say what I was really afraid of. What if loving me is bad luck? What if something happens to you? What if fate is against us? “And you decide this is too difficult? I don’t even know when I’ll see you again.” I’d begun to sound a little desperate in a bad way, and I hated myself for it—this was only our second “date,” after all—but I was out of practice at calibrating my emotions.
“Hannah. Listen to me.” Wes’s eyes looked darker than usual. “I didn’t come over here and confess ten-years’ worth of pent-up feelings about you just to get you into bed. And I’m not going to give up on us just because our situation is difficult.”
“What if you decide I’m too difficult?”
His brow furrowed. “Are you fucking serious?”
