Page 25 of If You Were Mine (After We Fall 3)
There is something real here—the way I want you. I forced myself to smile. “You’re a much better actress than you led me to believe. You don’t give yourself enough credit for anything.”
“Hey.” Her brow furrowed. “No scolding me. I still have at least twenty minutes of Nice Theo left.”
“I’m not scolding. I’m encouraging. Because I don’t understand why someone as talented as you doesn’t sell her artwork somewhere. Or at least display it.”
She sighed and looked away from me. “I’m waiting until I create just the right piece to submit somewhere.”
“Are you working on it now?”
“No. I don’t have the right inspiration yet.”
“That’s an easy way out, isn’t it? Blaming a lack of inspiration.”
Her eyes snapped back to mine. “What do you mean?”
“You have plenty of beautifully-inspired pieces already. Why not submit one of those?”
“Because it has to be perfect,” she said. “You don’t understand.”
“Actually, I understand perfectly. You don’t think you’re good enough.”
She opened her mouth and closed it again, struggling with a defense.
“But you are, Claire.”
“What if they don’t think that?” She shook her head. “It doesn’t matter what I think or what you think. They might tell me I’m no good. And it will crush me.”
“So what? You can’t let that scare you into never taking a chance. I get that it’s not easy for you to put yourself out there that way. You’re not guaranteed the happy ending. But Claire.” I stopped moving and forced her to look at me. “I know how it ends.”
“You do?” Her eyes were wide and trusting, like she really believed I might be able to tell the future.
“Yes. Everyone dies.”
She rolled her eyes. “I can’t believe I fell for that.”
I gave her a sheepish grin. “Sorry, couldn’t resist. But it’s true, Claire. Life is short. Do you really want to live yours this way? Never taking a risk? Never testing your limits?”
“No,” she admitted. “But I don’t know how to make myself do it. I don’t know how to be different than I am. Even though sometimes I really, really wish I was.”
“Believe me, I get that.” Fuck yes, I got that. “But you don’t have to be anyone else. You just have to stop staring over the edge and jump.”
She looked up at me with huge eyes that said I want to trust you. “You make it sound easy.”
“It could be. You just have to want it badly enough.”
She lifted her chin slightly. “I do. I do want it.”
Neither of us moved. Suddenly it felt like we were talking about something other than art. Oh, fuck. Her lips are so close to mine. I could kiss her right here, right now. Just once. No one would even question it. And I want to—I really fucking want to. Just to know what it feels like.
Her lips fell open and she rose on tiptoe. Cursing myself, I stepped back. “Hey, give me a minute, OK? I need to use the bathroom real quick.”
She blinked at me in surprise. “Oh. Of course. I’ll meet you back at the table.”
I left her standing there and took off for the lobby, but instead of going into the men’s room, I went outside, hoping the cold air would clear my head.
What the fuck was I thinking? I couldn’t kiss her. Not here, and not ever! Not only would it break the contract, it would confuse her. Claire wasn’t the kind of girl who messed around. She didn’t just give her kisses away—it would mean something to her. I would mean something to her.
And she might mean something to me.
