“Shut the fuck up,” Parrish drawls, like he’s bored shitless. Thing is, when I glance over at him, I see his tattooed hand squeezed tight around the strap of his bag. He hides his feelings because he feels too much. It’s like I know a secret that nobody else does, and I can’t help it: I like the idea of that. “You ready?” he asks, looking right at me.
I nod because words won’t come.
Chasm, who’s still banned from the house for another week, looks between the pair of us like he can sense that something’s different. I don’t like it, the way he’s studying me and Parrish with those pretty amber eyes of his.
“Party tonight at Antonio’s,” Lumen repeats, and Chasm snorts.
“Obviously. How could you possibly think I didn’t know that?” he replies, slouching back against the lockers. He slides his hands into the pockets of his slacks. “I’ll be there. It’d be nice if my best friend joined me for once.”
“I already told you: there’s no way in hell that Tess won’t be checking on us. She comes into our rooms every thirty minutes—at least.” Parrish sighs heavily and closes his eyes, like he’s struggling to regain his composure. All week, he’s been sitting on his bed and drawing. I haven’t seen any of his work—he hasn’t offered to show me—but he gets so into it that he often doesn’t notice me if I stand in the doorway and watch.
“Danyella?” Lumen asks, but our friend is already shaking her head.
“Too much work to do for opening night. Sorry.” She shrugs her shoulders, but she doesn’t sound very sorry. Danyella doesn’t mind a party every now and again, and she isn’t a complete teetotaler or anything, but it’s about as much her scene as it is mine.
“Guess it’s just me and you then?” Lumen queries, and Chas shrugs, like he couldn’t care less either way. She turns to me and, before I can think to say anything at all, leans in and presses a glossy kiss to my mouth. “Consider going out with me for real. Stop thinking about Parrish all the time. Trust me: I spent years doing it.” She flicks him an angry look, and he scowls. “He’s a waste of time.”
Lumen takes off down the hall and, after a moment, Chasm follows.
“Lord help me,” Danyella murmurs. “Do me a favor, Dakota, and don’t date either of them.” She heads after the group, leaving me alone with Parrish.
“Shall we?” he asks, and based on the tone of his voice, he may as well be inviting me to a funeral.
“Yep.”
I follow after him, letting Kimber take the front seat, so I can hide in the back.
Just like I did the day that I arrived in Medina.
So much for progress.
I end up falling asleep as soon as I get home, tossing and turning through these terrible dreams where I’m in the ATV all over again, feeling it tip over, feeling that man grab me and drag me out the window. In the dream, he’s also the hiker, beating me with his stick until I wake up sweating.
A glance at my Tess-given phone shows me that it’s not quite eleven o’clock. So much for a quick nap. With a groan, I force myself out of bed to change out of my uniform only to notice that I do, in fact, have my door back.
Thank fuck.
Being able to talk to Parrish was nice, but we haven’t actually talked but for that one night. We’ve barely spoken all week. I guess this is his ‘thinking time’. He has to decide, Dakota, I tell myself, dropping my skirt to the floor and switching out the blazer, dress shirt, and tie for an oversized t-shirt and fresh panties. He has to decide if you’re more important than Tess.
Because that’s what it all comes down to, doesn’t it? Me or her. He can’t have us both. How silly is it that he even needed to say that to me? Of course he can’t choose me over Tess. She’s his freaking mom. I’m a practical stranger. That, and teenage romances never last, do they? We’d probably have broken up before the summer was out anyway.
It’s just … it doesn’t feel like that.
It feels like my heart is broken and the whole world has been turned upside down.
“Snap out of it, Kota,” I murmur, slapping my hands against my cheeks. I’m being ridiculous. Parrish is just a boy, and I’m only in high school, and … well crap. Rational thought isn’t working for me right now. The heart is weird like that; you can rationalize with it all you want, but it rarely listens.
I flick my bedside lamp on—this gorgeous ceramic based beauty to finally replace the space-age monstrosity I used to have in here. The room is flooded with warm, yellow light that helps offset the white walls and the built-in chrome fixtures on the walls.
