Page 49 of You for Her (The Edge of Retaliation 2)
Nobody.
It takes him a moment for his hands to come up and then little by little, his arms circle around my body until he’s hanging onto me so tightly I can hardly breathe. I don’t mind, though. I don’t want this moment to ever end. Tears are rolling down my cheeks too, and we’re there together, feeling the same kind of pain. The desperate pain. The one that makes you wish you could take it away and start all over again.
Only you can’t. You know you can’t, so you have to suffer. You have to wait and hope that one day you won’t feel that way anymore. That one day you’ll remember how it feels to breathe freely again.
Tanner’s head turns toward mine, and our lips find each other’s. I know there are so many other things we should be doing right now, kissing not being one of them, but I can’t stop it. I don’t even know if I truly want to. I should hate Tanner, that would make so much more sense. I shouldn’t forget what he did, I shouldn’t feel this way about him, but my heart has other ideas.
Our tongues collide, our tears blend together, our hands become frantic and there is no turning back. We both know it. Right now, in this moment, he is all I need. He is all I want. He is all I can think of. His hands move to my shorts and with a bit of frantic maneuvering, he has them pulled down. I’m fumbling with his jeans, needing him inside me probably more than I’ve needed anything in the last few weeks.
I release his cock and place it between my legs, and then I sink down onto it. Right there in the park, where anyone could see. I start moving, riding him with a ferocity I didn’t even know I had in me. His growls turn into groans and my pleasure radiates through the quiet space in the forms of little whimpers. My orgasm finds me long before I’m ready, taking my body almost desperately. I cry out, clutching him, my fingernails biting into his shoulders.
He keeps me moving, his big hands on my hips, moving me up and down. My arms are wrapped around his neck, my face buried in it. I kiss the skin on his neck, tasting the slight saltiness that caresses my mouth. He moans when my lips graze over his jawline, my body still pulsing from my orgasm. I want another one, so badly, I want to feel what I just felt again, before this moment is over.
Because once it’s over, I don’t know if I’ll get it back.
I don’t know if we can ever be anything more than enemies, the people who hurt each other so deeply we’re forever scarred.
Can we honestly ever move past that?
Tanner finds his release, his hands clutching my hips. I keep myself wrapped around him, holding his big body as close to mine as I can get it, wanting to make sure in this moment, at the very least, he feels safe. He knows that I understand. He knows that I feel his pain as deeply as he does. When his body stops trembling from release, I pull away from him and look into his eyes, which are hard to see, but even in the dull glow of the streetlight, I can see they’re red.
“We’re dangerous together,” I whisper, taking his face into my hands, stroking my thumbs over his cheeks. “There is just so much between us, and yet I find it hard to stay away from you.”
“I lied to you,” he growls, his voice still raspy from sex. “When I said that none of it meant anything to me. I lied. It did mean something. That made it even harder for me to do what I did. When you told me your version of the story, it threw me. I was fightin’ a war against myself, because a huge part of me felt something toward you and it confused me. It scared the fuck out of me, too. I had believed my own version for so long, and meeting you, seein’ how you were, the person you were … It threw me off. I liked you, fuckin’ more than you know.”
“But it didn’t stop you from continuing on with your plan,” I whisper, my voice shaky.
“No, it didn’t. I fucked up, Callie. I don’t have anything else to say to that except I’m sorry. I’m fuckin’ sorry. You didn’t deserve it.”
I nod, because what else is there to say?
I get off him and fix myself, and then sit down beside him while he adjusts his jeans. For a while, we sit in silence, and then he says to me, “Chase isn’t the only reason I’m on this trip.”
