Page 26 of Leave Me (Touch of Death 2)
“I did mean it,” I lie.
He huffs a laugh and leans closer. “If you meant it, you wouldn’t turn to stone when I touch your pussy.”
Embarrassment and anger swirl together, and I know my face is every shade of red. On a deep breath, I lean closer to him. The scent of cigarette smoke and whiskey permeates the air in a cloying fog. I shuffle closer still, but he makes no move toward me, forcing me to come to him all the way. I awkwardly tilt my head and press my lips to his. I’m stiff and uncomfortable. I don’t know where to put my hands, or what to do because it’s all so un-natural. He allows me to remain there with my lips pressed to his for long seconds. Finally, he breaks, and it’s almost a relief. His hand winds through my hair, and he yanks my head back. It’s all the opportunity he needs to thrust his tongue past my lips. I have to fight the urge to gag. He drops his hand from my hair to my pajama shirt, tugging it until I hear a sharp tear, and then his hand is on my breast. My mind wavers, caught between the instinctual need to get away from him and the knowledge that this is what I have to do. He paws at me while mauling my mouth for long moments, and then he finally shoves away. My gaze drops to the sheets in front of me as shame crawls over my skin like insects. He says nothing, and my body tenses under the silence.
His fingers wind around my jaw once more, and he tilts my head back, forcing me to look at him. He places what’s left of the cigarette to his lips, drawing the last bit of life from it. Then he leans in, brushing his lips over mine. “Not good enough, principessa,” he says, blowing smoke over my lips with every word until I’m choking on it. A sick smile crosses his lips before he yanks my head to the side abruptly. Then he stamps the cigarette into my neck, right at the base where it meets my shoulder
I grit my teeth hard enough that they grind over each other. Enrique wants me to scream, so I don’t—I refuse to give him that pleasure. I inhale sharp breaths unable to tear my focus from that tiny spot of blinding pain. I swear, I can feel my skin melting. I’m not sure if he’s finally satisfied or simply realized that I’m not going to give him what he wants, but he stops. Without a word, he pushes to his feet and walks out of the room, locking my door behind him. I sit there, with my shirt torn and my breast exposed. My neck throbs, and finally, I allow my tears to fall. I feel violated and dirty, and I know this isn’t even the beginning. He can make my life so much worse. Enrique can do whatever he wants to me because even if I fight him, what chance do I have? And in this place, I have no allies. The few I had, I’ve shunned. No one will save me, not if I scream or beg. This is what I chose though. These are the horrors I must endure and the sacrifices I must make.
Swiping at my face, I swallow down my self-pity and crawl out of bed. Going into the bathroom, I turn on the down lighting around the mirror. I didn’t remove the layers of make up before I crawled into bed, and thick, black mascara lines now bleed down my face, like paint running down a ruined canvas. What was once pretty is now an ugly, sad story. My gaze drops to the angry red spot that mars the base of my neck, almost at my collar bone. The skin is raw and weeping already. I dig around in one of the bathroom drawers and remove a washcloth before soaking it in cold water. My teeth snap together on a hiss as soon as I press it to the tiny patch of blistered skin. I have to ask myself why. Perhaps he wanted to punish me for taking the ring off, or maybe he just likes hurting women, demonstrating his power. Of course, he could simply be a horrible drunk. Either way, he gave me a glimpse of what he’s capable of, and though it scares me, knowledge is power. I feel better simply for knowing how this will pan out. It’s the waiting and the not knowing that weigh heavily on the mind. After a few minutes, I remove the cloth and manage to find an antiseptic cream and a band aid.
When I finish, I turn off the light and crawl back into bed. For the first time all night, I fall asleep and stay asleep.
