Page 25 of Double Trouble
He wasn’t supposed to guess the truth of it in a flash. He was supposed to be fed up, angry. That man I could reject easily, turn my feelings off for.
But this man, the one with understanding in his eyes, backing away himself, there was no going cold on. I still tried anyway.
“I want to go home now,” I said, though it wasn’t exactly how I felt.
I couldn’t let him know how right he’d been with his spur-of-the-moment statement. How he’d hit to the core of it. How – unlike my expectations – kissing him hadn’t felt wrong at all. How it’d felt as right as kissing could, like coming home.
“Of course,” he said easily. Already he’d gotten started on folding the blanket we’d been sitting on.
I grabbed the wine bottle, glaring at it. It was partially responsible for all this – me revealing all that about Brent and my fears and now, Owen’s and my kiss. Only partially, though. The real one to blame for all of this was me.
“You ready to go?” Owen asked.
I nodded.
The car ride home was silent. Owen looked disappointed, sure, but no matter how many times I snuck a look over, the frustration I expected to see on his full lower lip never entered into the picture.
No, he dropped me off and only waved, stopping me when I was about to shut the door. “Hey Cin?”
“Yeah?”
“I had a great time. Sorry about how it ended.”
I eyed him incredulously. “I was the one who kissed you and pulled away.”
“Yeah, but I was the one who brought the wine, had the whole beach idea. And I’d be lying if I didn’t say that part of me had been hoping for a chance at that kiss.”
I could only pause there, looking at him. God, he was gorgeous. His tousled sandy strands my fingers now ached to touch, his brown eyes made black in the dark, yet no less earnest.
“Thanks for taking me out today,” I said. “Goodnight Owen.”
“Goodnight Cin.”
I’d been avoiding eye contact, but right now, I couldn’t resist stealing a look. His intent gaze held mine. I could feel myself falling, sinking toward him, irresistible.
No room for self-control, for anything but giving into this inevitable pull, this closer and closer and-
No.
At the last second, I ripped my gaze off his, pulled back and slammed the door shut. And then I turned my back on Owen Powers.
On the walk up to my apartment, tears pressed at the backs of my eyes, while the corners of my lips kept poking up. They hadn’t gotten the memo yet.
That it wasn’t a good thing that Owen’s feelings were as strong for me as mine were for him, that he’d said as much for Jake’s feelings too. Neither was it good that kissing him hadn’t felt wrong at all.
If this didn’t work out, I was in for a whole world of pain. Inside my room, flopped on my bed in my nightie, I thought about calling Penelope up, then thought better of it. The odds of her being on a Tinder date were ninety to one, and I wasn’t sure I wanted her brand of pep talk tonight. No, the only person I could talk to about this was also the last person I should be talking to at all.
Jake picked up on the first ring.
“Let me guess. Things went not just a-ok with my brother but grrreat!”
“You’re in a good mood.”
“Yeah, well, I just ate three croissants. And I don’t have a guilty conscience plaguing me.”
Despite myself, I had to smile.
“Still, all this is messing with my head,” I said to him.
“Mine too,” Jake admitted. “Want to come over now and brainstorm about it together?”
I paused. The offer was tempting. Our sex had been hot with a capital H. Maybe if I spent enough time with Jake, Owen would change his mind about being ok with us too. Although I wasn’t sure I really wanted that.
“No,” I said finally.
Jake sighed loudly. “Guess I’ll just have to make do with my imagination.”
“Guess so.”
“What are you wearing?”
“Jake!”
“Hang on – Owen just texted me. Ooohh a ripped tee. You’ll wear that for me next time?”
“Actually, I changed into PJs. Though you seriously asked Owen what I was wearing so you can…”
“Yup. Why not?” Jake was utterly nonplussed. “I mean, I walked in on him jerking off to you, so it’s only fair.”
“Yeah, did not want to know that.”
“You’re blushing right now, aren’t you?”
“Ok, I think it’s time for me to go to bed,” I said firmly.
“Sure you don’t want me to come tuck you in?”
Knock, knock, knock.
I strode out of my room to stare at my front door.
I wasn’t expecting anyone, so who could it be? Whoever it was, it was at least a good excuse to get off the phone.
“Listen Jake, I really have to go, there’s someone at the door,” I said, even though I still hadn’t decided whether I was going to answer it.
