Page 7 of Pretend You're Mine
My gaze wandered back to the family photo. I would’ve chucked it, if it wasn’t out of reach. This was their fault really.
Why couldn’t they get it? Coming from the family I had, having the job I did, what person in their right mind would still believe in the merits of love and marriage?
I took another sip of sherry. There was no point in staying plopped here, feeling sorry for myself. The only thing to do was think of a Plan B – and fast.
As I picked up the phone, there was another incoming call. Answering it, I frowned at the familiar voice: Jen.
“Hey, long time no see.” There was a forced casualness to her tone.
“Indeed,” I said.
I heard her intake of breath as she was about to say something else, so I cut her off. “Look Jen, I’m married now. You need to move on.” I hung up before I could hear any sort of reaction, angry or sad or otherwise. Although things between Jen and I had been casual over the past few months, and I’d seen other people too, I’d been getting the feeling that she’d wanted something more. Wasn’t like all my hookups were staying late to make me peanut butter toast in the morning, bringing me cinnamon cookies at night. No amount of times of me telling her that I didn’t want anything serious had seemed to get through to her. Maybe the only way to finally get her to see was to be an asshole.
My phone was still in my hand, and I had to do what I’d set out to – call Naomi.
“What?” she said, sounding guarded.
“I’m sorry about before,” I said, trying to hide the surprise in my voice that she’d actually answered the call.
I was on my feet now, pacing. After a few more seconds, she still hadn’t responded.
“I shouldn’t have tried to pay you off,” I continued, “It was a total dick move. I just didn’t know what else to do.”
“How about just agreeing to annul the marriage like a reasonable person?” she asked.
“If you really knew me, you’d realize I’m not all that reasonable,” I admitted.
“Hmph,” was the only noise she made, although I could’ve sworn I heard a smile in it.
It was true, too. I’d sat for the LSAT three times even though I’d passed it the first, because I knew I could score higher. Even now as a working lawyer I hadn’t let up. With cases I didn’t just go the extra mile – I ran the whole fucking thing – staying up more nights than not investigating cases and claims, looking for the tiniest snare of a loophole. In the office, where I shared a hallway with two other lawyer friends from school, James and Greg, they called all the crazy things I did in the name of the Xander Files.
I needed to change tactics. Right now, what was needed was some empathy to get Naomi on my side. And I was, admittedly, a bit curious about this stubborn gorgeous woman I had married.
“You said you had your own business,” I said.
“Yeah,” Naomi replied. “I own a hair salon, Eighteen. It’s in the Clair Creek area.”
“That sounds nice,” I said, for lack of anything better. I didn’t know the first thing about a woman’s hair salon. I’d gone to the same barber for years in a simple, no frills shop within walking distance from my office.
“It can be. It can also be stressful,” she said.
“Listen Naomi. If you did this, it would really help me out. Would it really be that bad?” I asked. “Just a few weeks, over the holidays. You just have to show up to a couple of family functions, nothing major, smile and chat with some people and pretend you don’t hate me. And I wouldn’t tell anyone.”
“But still,” she argued. “What if someone saw us and found out?”
“Couldn’t you just claim that I was some guy you were dating?”
“I don’t really know anything about you. How would I fool your family if I don’t know anything about you?”
“Trust me,” I said, “It doesn’t matter. My family loves to talk about themselves. The most that any of them know about me is that I’m a lawyer who still hasn’t gotten married. That’s all you need to know.”
She remained silent, so I continued. “Ok, what do you want to know? That when I first broke out on my own as a lawyer that I was so scared shitless that I couldn’t do anything for the first month but organize and reorganize my office? That I color coded the folders for the clients I didn’t yet have?”
“It’s more than I knew five minutes ago,” she said in a clipped voice.
“Fine.” I forced my voice into neutrality. “What else do you think it would be beneficial to know?”
