Page 39 of Take Me For Granite

“How did it find all of that so quickly?”

“Magic.”

He gives me a look. “April.”

“What? You’re literally a cursed gargoyle. I feel like we’ve established that magic is real.”

He makes a sound that might be a laugh.

I click the first result.

It’s a website with a purple background, animated stars, and a title that reads TEN SIMPLE WAYS TO BREAK ANY CURSE.

“Excellent,” I say. “Ten simple ways. We should have you fixed up before dinner.”

Gabriel looks deeply skeptical. “Somehow, I doubt that.”

“Don’t be negative.”

“I’m being realistic.”

“You’re being a grump.”

He makes a humming sound in his throat. “An accurate assessment.”

I scroll. “Okay. First one. Purification ritual.”

“What does that entail?”

“Apparently, we need to cleanse your aura.”

He stares at me. “My what?”

“Your aura.”

“I don’t believe I have one.”

“Everybody has an aura.”

“Even gargoyles?”

“Especially gargoyles. Yours is probably all gray and cranky.”

He sighs.

I keep reading.

“Okay. We need salt, a white candle, and some sage.” I stand to begin gathering supplies.

“I believe there is salt in the kitchen,” he says.

“Great. And I have candles.”

“Of course you do.”

I look over my shoulder. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Nothing.”