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Thankfully, I had an excuse. One that she and my father couldn’t argue against, no matter how badly they might have wanted to. Pulling my phone from my pocket, I swiped from app to app for a few seconds, using the pause to calm my erratically beating heart.

Without looking up at her, I lied. “Jason just told me there was an issue at the restaurant. Something about supplies arriving a week early. I’ve got to go. Give my love to dad and Jackson, as well as my apologies to the Caldwell-Moore’s.” As I fled the estate, leaving my mother behind in the kitchen, I kept my pace measured despite my rapid pulse and the rush of blood roaring in my ears.

I made it home without giving space to any of the emotions that were threatening to escape. Once I was showered and dressed for bed, I no longer needed to ignore the gaping emotional wound my mother insisted on tearing open. I was numb.

I shut my phone off, allowing myself to be swallowed up by the pit I had avoided falling into for almost six months.

Thankfully, everyone believed I would be busy for the weekend. I didn’t have the energy to try and explain away an extended absence. Besides, how did one explain that they were severely depressed because of childhood trauma their parents neglected to acknowledge was even there, let alone that they were the cause of?

Chapter Four

Tristin sat in front of me, teasing, “I know that look. You got stuck on a big fat kn—”

I glared, quickly silencing him. “You’re not here to talk about my lack of a love life. You’re here to discuss why these changes I told you about four months ago have not been implemented. Four months, Tris.”

“I’ll answer your question when you answer mine. Who’s the lucky alpha, darling?”

“There is no ‘lucky alpha’.” I returned my attention to my work, mumbling. “Just some cute guy I met at the hospital.”

“See!” Tristin practically yelled. “I knew it! You always get this dopey far off look in your eyes and a small yet telling grin on your face when you meet some well-off alpha.” He sighed wistfully. “I wish it were me.”

“It is you, you overgrown child. You’re a ‘well off alpha’. You come from one of the richest families on the west coast. Why is it that I must remind you of this on a near daily basis?” I fussed, completely exasperated.

“Because I often forget that I was born into the lap of luxury, with a silver teat to suckle on, and undeniably good looks,” Tristin joked, preening as he smoothed his hand over his blond hair, his blue eyes beaming. “Thank you for reminding me.” I had half a mind to call security to escort him out, but before I could, he was speaking again. “Wait, you were at the hospital?”

I wanted to kick myself for slipping up and sharing that bit of information, but I continued cautiously. “Yes, a routine checkup.”

“That’s all the information I’m getting?” He folded his arms over his chest, an eyebrow arched and his stare penetrating.

This was what I was afraid of. Tristin knew me well enough to pick up on any slight omitting of the truth. “Unless you’re willing to talk about why you pay me to tell you what to do and then completely disregard my suggestions, yes, that is all of the information you’re getting.” I knew he wasn’t going to want to speak about business right now, not when he’d latched onto my mistake. Leveraging that against him was wise.

“Fine,” Tristin huffed as he rose to his feet. “Tell your cute head of security, Jonah, I said hi.” He called out over his shoulder on the way out.

I did my best to focus on the mountain of paperwork I needed to get through but kept returning to our conversation. Tristin was wrong. I didn’t have a “far off dopey look” in my eyes, because there was absolutely no reason to have that look. Eli and I met up for dinner a few days ago and I had yet to hear from him. How could he text me all day long and then… nothing? But most importantly…

“Why does it bother me?!” I placed my head in my hands, sighing loudly. That small voice, the one that I’d been trying hard to ignore, was loud as it whispered…

He can probably smell it on you, your inability to get pregnant.

He knows you’re defective. He doesn’t want to waste his time.

You’re barren. Empty. What can you give him aside from your body?

Pressing the heels of my palms to my eyes, I inhaled deeply, holding my breath for a few seconds. I focused on pushing my thoughts away, or tried to, but when I failed, I found myself giving in to the inner turmoil. I paged my executive assistant, letting them know to cancel the rest of my day. I was able to sneak out, avoiding the front desk and the prying eyes of any staff by slipping out of the back door to make the short trek to the parking structure. Along the way, I lit a cigarette, hoping it would calm my nerves. However, smoking proved to be the least relaxing thing I could do as it led to me reminiscing about the first conversation I had with Eli. Like a crazy person—and perhaps I was—I flailed my arms and stomped my feet, pouting. I pulled out my phone, firing off a quick text.

Delaney:

What kind of person is insistent, annoyingly so, about a stranger going to dinner with them and then has the audacity to not reach out to them for three days?

Hospital Alpha:

. . .

Hospital Alpha:

. . .

The typing indicator dots popped up and disappeared for several long seconds. I chewed on my bottom lip, flicking the ashes from my cigarette.