Page 4 of Fear Me Not

I’m a selfish son of a bitch. I know that. When I brought her to Windridge Hall, I’d wanted her to end up trapped here with us. I’d wanted for her to be the thing that got us through the long winter months with our minds and bodies intact.

Things get strange here when the snow falls and the long nights draw in. Things that can’t always be explained, and not just because I live here with my two sons. I meant what I said to Aspen about places absorbing energy, and Windridge Hall has a lot of history.

She’s put everything strange that’s happened around here down to Dov, but there’s far more to it, and she’ll find that out soon enough.

Assuming she lives.

3

DOV

Even like this, or perhaps because she’s like this, she is perfection.

I know there’s something wrong with me that I can look at her now, pale and barely conscious, and all I think is how beautiful she is. This is like another version of when she’s asleep, only deeper.

Like this, I can do whatever I want without fear of being judged or questioned. I can allow my gaze to linger over her long limbs, to drink in every detail of her. I feel as though I’ve already imprinted every freckle and scar and line onto my brain, yet every time I observe her, I find something new to remember and wonder at. I still want to spread her legs and sink into her, penetrate her with my fingers and tongue and dick. The idea of doing so makes me hard. I don’t care that she would just lie there beneath me, perhaps only moaning occasionally while I lost myself in her. It’s better that way. I won’t need to worry that she’d do or say something that would make me lose control of myself.

My palms itch to remove the blanket covering her body, but I remind myself she’s not just asleep. She needs the blanket and the warmth from the fire if she’s going to survive.

We need her to live.

I wish my father and brother weren’t here so I could be left alone with her, but I know that’s not possible. While Levi contributes very little, our father is saving her life. It wouldn’t be safe to be left alone with Aspen right now. I’d be bound to do something—perhaps in simply not doing anything at all—that would put her in danger.

I can’t be trusted.

I shake the thought from my head.

My compulsion to watch the goings-on of the hotel from behind my screens might seem strange to some, but my cameras meant that I saw Aspen run from the building and watched her take Blake’s vehicle. The moment I saw her running toward it, I knew what she was planning, and I got moving as well. I chased her out of the hotel, but by the time I’d stepped into the snow, the Range Rover had already vanished from sight. I’d been able to follow the tire tracks, using them to make my path easier.

My footsteps had crunched in the snow as I’d run, and I hadn’t even felt the cold. My mind had been focused on one thing—reaching Aspen. Had I already known that she would go off the road? Perhaps I had, because when I’d seen the skid marks in the snow, I hadn’t been surprised. A small part of me had been relieved she hadn’t gotten too far.

Maybe I’d known the hotel wouldn’t allow her to leave.

It had taken me some time to climb down to her, though, and then to free her from the vehicle. With every passing minute, I’d been aware of how exposed she was to the elements. I hadn’t given my own exposure any thought.

I’ve lived like a ghost for so long, perhaps a part of me had believed I was already dead.

“We need to take her to the hospital,” Levi insists.

He’s tearing at his hair, pacing the floor, his fingers knotted in the dark strands. If the situation wasn’t so serious, I’d find myself amused at his change in demeanor. My brother acts like he doesn’t give a fuck about anything. It’s as though the whole world exists just to piss him off, and yet here he is, losing his mind over a girl.

“She could be dying right in front of us,” he adds.

“How the fuck do you suggest we get her to the hospital?” Blake snaps back. “My car is halfway down the fucking mountain, and even if it wasn’t, we couldn’t make it down the mountain pass in these conditions.”

“We could try,” Levi insists. “I’d rather fucking die trying than lose her like this.” He thinks for a moment. “We still haven’t taken that asshole’s car apart that’s hidden in the shed. Maybe we could use that.”

“Absolutely not. It’s even less suited than my Range Rover. It would be a suicide mission. Besides, no one can see you driving it. If you turned up to the hospital in that car, you’d be caught on CCTV, and then people would be asking questions.” Blake plants his hands on his hips and shakes his head. “Not that it matters either way. You’ll never even reach the car, and it’ll be snowed in by now. By the time you dig it out, Aspen will have hopefully recovered.”

We should have reduced that car to pieces by now, but we all knew the weather was coming, so no one else would find it, and it’s been a bit of a case of out of sight, out of mind. We’ve all been distracted by having Aspen here.

Levi chews anxiously at a hangnail on his thumb. “How long is it going to take for her to wake up?”

Blake pinches the spot between his eyebrows. “Honestly, I’m not sure. Could be a few hours. Could be more.”

“More?” Levi’s dark eyebrows raise. “Like a day or more? Wouldn’t that suggest some serious damage? What if she has fucking brain damage or something?”

He shoots me a look as though to make a point. I know what happened to me. I might have issues, but I’m not fucking stupid.