Page 1 of Masked Instincts

one

LUNA

The library lights twinkle softly, a candle-like glow floating around the room. The air smells like leather, almond, and vanilla from books that have lived underneath the light for so long. The tall ceilings make me feel small as if I were nothing but an insect.

This is my favorite place on campus. Between its cream-colored walls and leather-bound books, I spend nearly every waking moment studying, taking notes, and engaging in whatever other activities I can find to keep my mind busy. Rollerblading, hanging out with my best friend, getting coffee at the local shop. An endless amount of mundane tasks to keep my quiet mind occupied outside of school work.

It’s been almost three months into my third year of my bachelor’s in Social Work. It’s the final year of my bachelor's, too, since I’m working to graduate early. I’ll still be stuck here for another two after graduation to get my masters. I could get a level entry job with just my bachelors if I wanted, but I want more than that. Need more. I want to help every single person to the best of my abilities. I’ve been in the shoes of the one needing help, and I’m just repaying the favor.

A creak from the library door shatters the silence filled room. My eyes draw upward to see who it is. Not many people come to the library this late at night, nearly ten o’clock. Everyone is cooped up in their dorms or at their off-campus apartments. But it’s just my best friend, Chase. His blonde hair is slicked back, the normal look he wears so well. His white sweater vest is tucked neatly into his dark jeans held by a brown belt. Brown loafer shoes complete the outfit. He’s always well-dressed, good at matching colors, and obnoxiously handsome. The downfall? Gay.

I remember the first time I saw him. His beauty and the way he carried himself intrigued me. I stared at him in class every day and he always noticed me. I wanted to make my move time and time again until one day I saw him face-sucking with another guy in the hall.

I had my answer.

I was so glad I hadn’t made a complete fool of myself.

“Hey, Luna,” Chase says as he drops his book on the table. A small thud echoes off the high ceilings, carrying the noise longer than necessary.

“Hey, friend,” I smile. My alone time is precious, but somehow, I love it more when Chase is around. Even if we sit in pure silence, reading chapter after chapter on Social Work, it’s a pleasant time to share with someone who understands.

He spares me a glance and there’s a small bruise beneath his right eye. For a moment, I thought maybe it was a shadow, but that purple and blue coloring couldn’t be mistaken.

“Chase! What happened?” I implore.

“It’s not a big deal.” He shrugs before lightly caressing his fingers along the tender skin of his cheekbone.

“The sky is yellow. What happened?” I ask again. He sighs, but his shoulders sag as he gives in.

“I was in the hall with Aaron. Some guys walked by,” he tells me. That’s all I need to know; I can fill in the rest of the pieces by myself.

They beat him.

“Chase,” I say. “Did you know them?”

“Well, that’s the worst part, isn’t it? I didn’t know them. They just didn’t want to see me being me,” he explains and my heart shatters. He’s wearing a long sleeve beneath his vest. I watch him roll his sleeves up, exposing scratches along his arms. I softly run my hand over them and he trembles beneath my touch. The icy cold feeling inside me has turned into molten lava as if a volcano erupted.

He pulls his shirt out from his pants and bunches it up in his hand to show me his body. More bruises cover his ribs and my eyes water at the sight.

“You can’t let them win like this. If you do nothing, they will think they can do it again and again. You need to do something!” I exclaim.

“No, Luna. I’m not going to do a thing,” he bites back at me.

“You’re going to school for a degree to help people, but you can’t even help yourself,” I scoff.

“I don’t want to talk about this. Forget it. The bruises will be gone in a few days and it will be another beating to put in the past,” he states.

My heart breaks all over because he’s right. It is another. This happens more often than either of us would care to admit. Chase is proud to be out and he’s accepted who he is, but it comes with consequences because that’s the world we live in. I just wish I could do something about it.

How would those people feel if someone beat them for being themselves? This is the type of shit I won’t stand for because I know what it’s like to be belittled for living, but I know if I did something about it, it wouldn't help Chase. If anything it would only hurt us.

The next hour passes in slow motion as I sneak glances at Chase, and even if he thinks I don’t notice, I see him stealing ones of his own.

I want him to find help or put up a defense to the people so cruel, but he never listens. Trying to make him budge is like moving rocks along an ocean shore. Nearly impossible. He is a boulder himself. A dumb, stupid, beautiful boulder.

“I can hear you complaining in your head. It’s like a damn megaphone,” Chase finally speaks as we pack up our books.

“You can not. That’s not even possible.”