Page 27 of Big Mistletoe

I hear Rachel before I see her. “I have to admit, the place looks amazing.”

Nick laughs. “You sound surprised.”

“I’m not surprised. I knew Joy would do a good job. I just didn’t know how much it would change the whole place.”

I stop and smile. I should feel guilty for eavesdropping, but I stand here and listen.

Rachel continues, “It feels different. Happier. More festive. Everyone loves it.”

There’s a pause, then Nick says, “Yeah. She did good.”

I can feel my cheeks warm. My clients are usually satisfied with my work, but this feels even better. I had hoped Nick would love this, and it seems he’s happy with it.

I’m about to walk around the corner when Rachel says, “It’s going to feel empty when all this comes down.”

Nick sighs. “Yeah, but in January, everything has to go back to normal. It will all go back to the way it was.”

I stop and tighten my hand around the strap of my tote. His words replay in my head. Back to normal. I don’t know why those three words hit me as hard as they do. I know I’ve tried to not let myself think too far into the future. But to hear him say it like that makes me question everything. I know that Christmas will be over and the decorations will have to come down. What else does he want to go back to normal?

Everything happened so fast that I never stopped long enough to ask what happens when Christmas is over. But I guess now I know.

I quietly turn and head toward the side exit. I need to think, and I can’t do that if I walk past him because sure enough, he would find a reason to pull me into his arms and touch me, and I would probably fall apart.

I make it to my car and shut the door. My chest hurts as if my heart is actually breaking in two. What the hell was I thinking?

Nick is eleven years older than me. He owns his own business, and before I even came into the picture, he had his life together. He doesn’t need me. I’m just someone to keep him entertained through the holidays. And like a fool, I fell in love. Oh my God, I moved in with him, I sleep with him, I took an office in his building. So much for standing on my own two feet. What am I going to do when he wants everything to go back to normal?

I’m going to have a broken heart, that’s what.

I close my eyes. Oh God. Why did I let myself fall in love with him?

My phone rings, and I jump in surprise. I look down and see my landlord’s name on the caller ID. I almost don’t answer, but I swipe across the screen. “Hello?”

“Joy, I’ve got some good news. I have another unit ready for you.”

I shake my head in confusion. “What?”

“It’s across town, but it’s available today. Same rent. I can get you the keys this afternoon if you want it.”

I should be relieved, but instead my stomach is in knots. I know what I have to do, even if I don’t want to. This is a sign. It has to be.

I suck in a breath. “I’ll take it.”

I arrange to get the keys and access, and then I rush through my two jobs for today. Staying busy saves me from thinking about Nick, but when I pull up to his house and let myself inside, images of the last few days fill my head. I’m walking away, and even though I know it’s for the best, I don’t want to do it.

I go upstairs and pull my suitcase from the closet. It doesn’t take me long to pack up my clothes and toiletries. I carry everything out to my car and then go back inside. I do a quick sweep of the house, and each room I walk through, I think about Nick.

Because I can’t handle it another second, I leave the key on the kitchen counter and then lock the front door and run out to my car. As soon as I sit down, I type out a message to Nick. I delete it and then try again.

I read it. Nick, my landlord called and has another apartment ready for me. I’m going to go ahead and move in today. Thank you for letting me stay with you and for everything you’ve done for me. I really appreciate it.

I read it twice, and I know it sounds awful. It’s cold and formal, but I know if I say anything else, I’m going to do something stupid like tell him I fell in love with him, and I can’t do that.

I hit send, and then I turn my phone off.

I pull away from his house and drive to the new apartment. The keys are where the landlord said they would be, and I let myself in. It’s not the best part of town, but beggars can’t be choosers at this point. I quickly unload everything, and instead of sitting in this depressing apartment, I drive back across town to the women’s shelter.

I asked Maverick, the owner, if I could decorate their commons room for Christmas, and I know it’s cutting it a little close, but at least this will keep my mind off Nick.