Page 99 of Once Upon a Devilish Duke

“I am not capable of being the kind of man you need me to be. I would make you miserable.”

“I disagree. I think you are hiding behind this metaphorical theory that all that love you will be hurt.”

“We wouldn’t work.”

She put her hands on her hips. If she were going to go away, then she may as well say her piece first. “So you say, but you need to stop running away from your fears and face them.”

“Rose! I didn’t run away. I left for the good of the child.”

“If you were to ask Maxine, I think she may dispute that. You never gave her a chance. You abandoned her because you could not face the death of a woman you didn’t even like. You talk about duty, but your most important duty you ignored for eight years, Edward!”

He turned away from her. “I do not need to listen to this. You have no idea of what you are talking about.”

“Then tell me.”

“No. Leave me.”

“Tell me!” She tugged on his sleeve until he turned toward her again.

“Get out now, Rose, while I still have my temper in check.” His eyes were dark with barely-contained fury.

“Tell me,” she pleaded. Fisting her fingers into his lapels.

He pushed her aside and strode away from her, raking his hands through his hair. He poured himself a large finger of scotch, downed it, and then turned to her.

“You really want to know the family shame? For once I tell you it cannot be undone. I have kept this to myself for years because I was trying to protect her.”

“Tell me. I promise I will tell no one else.”

He sat heavily in the chair by the fire. “She’s not mine!”

Rose took a step back in shock. “What?”

“Maxine is not my daughter. Are you happy now? Can you leave me in peace?”

“Why would you say that?”

“Because Victoria told me. On her dying breath, she told me that the child she had just given birth to was not mine. The witch died with a smile on her face, Rose, knowing she had destroyed me.”

“What if she lied? What if she said that to hurt you and it is not true?”

“You didn’t…see how she looked…at me. I may not have loved her, but she hated me with every part of herself. It would not surprise me if she lay with every man within a five mile radius just so she could present me with a child that was not mine. As a petty revenge against the man who had taken her away from the balls of London.”

“No one would have known. You could have just ignored an obviously demented woman who had just been through a great trauma. Edward, you left that poor little girl with no one on a maybe.”

“I left to protect her. Lest I tell someone in my grief or in anger. Don’t you see? I didn’t leave her with no one. I left her with everyone because I wanted them to love her. I wanted them to hate me but love her. That way she would be protected always. They could give her what I could not.”

Rose turned away, not knowing how to process this information, tears burning at the corners of her eyes. She could see in his face how tormented he had been by this secret. So scared that the family would reject her as well if they knew Max was nothing but a bastard.

He bent over, leaning on his thighs and staring into the fire. “Rose, how could I look at her, knowing she was another man’s child?”

“Oh, Edward,” she said. “You didn’t even give her a chance.”

“I thought it was what was best, and then with every year that passed I convinced myself that it was too late to change things. That she was happy and loved, and me just turning up would be somehow wrong. That she would see my doubt.” He raked his fingers through his hair. “Is she happy?”

Rose knelt in front of him, her hands on his thighs. “She is an amazing joyful child. She is smart and artistic and loving. And yes, well loved.”

Edward nodded. “You see, she has thrived without me.”