Page 81 of The Lockdown Mann

We’re lying together in bed again, heads on our pillows, wrapped up in each other, when he says, “I know things are fucked up right now, but I can’t do anything until Ree and I are on the same page…and I have Tiana to worry about. I don’t want to confuse her by rushing into something else, and—”

“Shh.” I bite his lip. “It’s okay. As long as I know we’re on the same page.”

“This isn’t like what you had with Kane. I promise. I’d be proud to call you mine.”

“I am yours…and I can wait.” I’ve waited this long for Oakley. I can wait a little longer.

And I can ignore the voice in my head that says this won’t ever be real.

CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN

Oakley

Just as the buzzer goes off, Tiana throws her hands up in the air and says, “What’s up now!”

When I see the look of genuine surprise on Des’s face, I double over laughing.

“She just beat me at air hockey,” he says.

“I told you she’s good.”

“No, like, literally beat me. I didn’t let her win.”

“I know,” I answer as Tiana says, “Wait. Why would you let me win?”

“He wouldn’t, baby girl.” I walk over and kiss the top of her head. “Des just isn’t used to not being number one.”

“You beat him most of the time,” she says.

“Is there a reason you’re both pointing out my flaws?” Des teases, making me laugh again.

The past couple of weeks have been indescribable. Des and I have been finding even more moments to spend together, which isn’t easy considering we’re both juggling professional football careers, and I have Tiana, Ree, and Sanaa to think about, but somehow, we’re making it work. It’s a little easier since the Pulse have their bye week, so I don’t have anything football-related going on. I’m able to sneak by in between Des’s practices, and his game is at home this week.

There haven’t been any other grand declarations other than what we shared the first night he fucked me, but I know what I want, and it’s him. I never expected to go from one relationship to another, but it feels too natural with Des, inevitable, like a continuation of what we started eleven years ago.

I always have his words in the back of my head, though—what he said about Kane. I don’t ever want Des to feel like he’s not enough for me. I never want to hurt him by keeping him, keeping us, hidden, but I feel like someone in every direction needs me. I’m trying to do what’s best for everyone involved. I still don’t know what the future holds for Des and me, other than that we both care about each other and want to be together. It’s a clusterfuck without adding to the mix that I think I might already be in love with someone else, that maybe a part of me has always loved Desmond.

“Let’s play again,” Des tells Tiana, and she playfully rolls her eyes at him.

“Look. Even she knows you’re ridiculous,” I say, but it’s fun watching them together. She’s liked Des from the start, and he’s good with her. He doesn’t mind hanging out with the daughter of the man he’s secretly in a relationship with.

“Only if you promise not to try to let me win. I can do that on my own.”

He smiles at her. “Damn, girl. You bad, ain’t you?”

“I am.” She nods, and we both know it’s true.

They play two more games, Tiana winning one and Des the other. We spend a good four hours at his place before T and I need to head to Sanaa and Evander’s to meet Ree there.

Des walks us out, hands stuffed into his pockets, watching me. I wonder if he’s having as hard a time not touching me as I’m having not touching him. I crave his touch in a way we haven’t been able to do all day, want to pull him close, feel his hard body against mine, taste his sweet fucking mouth that can be so dirty and brings me to my knees.

“Daddy?” Tiana says in a voice that tells me it’s not the first time she’s spoken to me. Oops. Being around Des is too distracting.

“Yeah, baby girl?”

“I asked if we can stop and get ice cream on the way.”

“I think Grandma wants us to make dessert with her, and after all the snacks Des had at his house for you today, I don’t think we need ice cream on top of that.” I give Desmond a pointed look. This is the first time I’ve brought Tiana to his house, and apparently, he thought he had to buy one of every option they have of drinks and food in the grocery store. Which was sweet, even if it was a little overkill.