Page 77 of The Offer

“Not at all.”

Kevin looked in her direction, and held up his thumb. “You okay here?”

She nodded, watching Kevin as he weaved through the crowd, joking with his new friend. Only Kevin would have an entire beer poured on him and find himself laughing with the culprit. It’s like he never got angry at anything; he always found the good in people, and made everyone happier and brighter around him. Even herself. Even when she was at her lowest point in life, he bottled sunshine and handed it to her in the shape of a snarky joke, a compliment, a subtle praise.

She smiled to herself as she leaned against the front railing, watching the band exit, the stage hands already cleaning up the equipment. Music blared through the speakers as the lights brightened, the sweet ringing in her ears reminding her of how amazing all of it was.

“Here alone?”

Jess looked up to find a tall man next to her, wearing an all-black ensemble—T-shirt, tight jeans, and a pair of black suede boots that felt impractical for the muggy August evening in the city. He leaned against the railing, his arm brushing against hers.

“Um, no, my friend went to get a drink at the bar.”

“Friend or…?”

Her face felt hot, her hands clammy. “Friend.”

His smirk was heart melting and beautiful, his straight jaw and five-o’clock shadow the kind you wanted to trace with your hands. “Can I buy you a drink then?”

“Tequila soda with lime, sweetheart,” Kevin said, thrusting a plastic cup in her direction. She watched as he paused, looking back and forth between Jess and tall, dark, and handsome. He froze.

She took her cup from Kevin’s hand, her fingers brushing his slightly. “Thank you.”

Handsome pushed off the railing, his height towering over Kevin by at least half a foot, maybe more. “If you want another, come find me.”

She watched him step away, a little dazed at being hit on for the first time in, well, ever. He was everything a girl could dream of, and yet…even if his looks made her insides melt, she wasn’t interested in more than a lingering look. Not in the slightest.

Kevin shuffled around her and lowered down into the bar seat next to him, resting his head back on the poster-covered wall as he took a sip of his beer. “You still have number eight, you know.”

Jess took a sip of her drink as well, shifting on her feet. “Not like this.”

He squinted his eyes. “What do you mean not like this? That was the perfect setup, Jess. You’re in a city where no one knows you. You could have your pick.”

She scanned the crowd with a slow turn, her heart sinking lower and lower. He was right; she could do it if she really wanted to. She could pull tall, dark, and handsome into a corner and have her way with him, and Kevin would let her do it. To make her happy. To give her what she deserved.

But it wasn’t what he deserved, and deep in her gut, she knew this wouldn’t make her happy. It would leave her feeling hollow.

There was really only one person who left her feeling whole.

She finished her circle and faced him, his hair slicked back and sticky from the beer. He placed his beer down on the table and threaded his hands, resting them casually in his lap.

Be brave, Jess.

She took a long gulp of her drink and placed it on the table as well, then stepped closer to him, right between his legs. She brushed her index finger down his neck, trailing his tattoo along his collarbone and down the opening of his button-down short-sleeve, following the ivy until it hit the center of his chest. She pinched the first button and flicked it open. “I’ve made my choice.”

He hummed, his hands still loose in his lap, not giving in to her touch. “Jess, I told you, I can’t practice with you. It…it would destroy me.”

“Maybe it’s not practice,” she whispered.

He let out a guttural sound as he leaned his head back again, slamming his eyes shut. “Sweetheart…please.”

“Please what?”

“Please don’t do this unless you’re absolutely sure you’re ready.”

She played with the next button of his shirt, tucking it in and out of its hole. She let out a shaky breath. “I can’t give you what you want,” she admitted. “I’m not sure when I’ll be ready for a big commitment. This…this is all I can give you right now.”

Her stomach twisted after she said it. She knew she was hurting him, and she hated herself for it. But she needed to be honest. She wasn’t sure what the “right” steps were after breaking off a nine-year relationship. But there was one thing she did know, and it was a step she was ready to take.