Page 65 of Lessons in Love

“You okay?” Her voice is small, barely above a whisper as she tucks herself into my side. Her fingers are lightly tracing a pattern on my palm and the contact makes me shiver. Michelle is too focused on the game, not removing her eyes from Ben’s form every time he’s on the field. I don’t know how they do it, all the time apart. I barely survive a few days without Eden. I never realised the enormity of what they’ve sacrificed for each other, and it makes me wonder what I’d do for her. Anything she’d ask me to.

“Yeah.” I nod. “I will be.”

Eden says nothing and nuzzles in closer. I wrap my arm around her shoulder and sighs. I hate that the two of them just happened to be in the same place today. I hate that Eden and I are yet to define our relationship.

She’s not just my friend anymore. I’m not just her tutor.

When Ben scores the game-winning goal, we all jump to our feet and cheer, Michelle the loudest. That girl has a good set of lungs on her.

“Benny boy!” Michelle runs into his arms as he leaves the locker room. “You played so well!”

“Showing off for your girlfriend, I suppose?” I clap him on the back, regretting my decision as my hand comes away with a thin layer of sweat and dirt.

“Nah mate,” Ben grins. “I’m showing off for yours.”

“Well, I am very impressed.” Eden’s by my side, laughing.

“Hear that?” Ben points at me. “You’ve got some competition.”

Rolling my eyes, we start walking back towards the carpark.

“You all good to get home?” I ask Eden. She nods.

“Misty and Gemma are coming to pick me up. They went shopping nearby so I’ll walk and meet them.”

I lean in to press a kiss to her forehead, but she turns before I can. Something heavy settles in my stomach. Turning around, Michelle watches us with her arms crossed.

“What?”

“Friend, huh?”

“What do you mean?”

Michelle rolls her eyes. “When you introduced Eden to Macie, you called her your friend. I heard that much. Don’t you think you guys are past that by now?”

“I didn’t know what else to say, okay. We haven’t exactly spoken about the specifics. And around Macie…That woman can smell fear.”

“Don’t be daft. She obviously wants to be with you.” I look to Ben for support, who conveniently dodges my eyes as he unlocks the car. “She’s coming to the party tomorrow night, okay? Make it up to her then.”

“You make it sound so easy.”

Michelle laughs as she clips her seatbelt in. “With women, it’s never easy.”

* * *

I spend the whole next day at my desk, hardly concentrating on anything. Michelle’s words ring in my ears as the hours count down. Seeing Eden again is usually something that makes my whole body ache to touch her. But now… Now I just don’t know how to feel. I want to be with her so badly, in whatever way she’ll let me.

Michelle has texted a few times, reassuring me that if I just talk to her, we can clear things up. I don’t bother to respond. I always had a feeling Macie would try to ruin any chance of happiness I could ever have. And I was right. You know when someone just has that feel to them? Like she feeds on the souls of the unhappy. Okay, that might be a bit of an exaggeration, but you get my point.

Hours later I end up at Ben’s door, and before I can even knock it swings open.

“Oliver! You came!” Ben claps me on the back and I can smell the beer on his breath.

“Mate, you’re pissed, aren’t you?”

The dopey smile and laugh he gives me is enough of an answer. “Come on in. We have to get you up to my level.”

Michelle’s homecoming party is already crowded. I’m genuinely shocked that they know this many people. Even though she’ll be going back to finish off the semester, this is a chance to catch up with everyone at the half-way point of her overseas adventure. Unfamiliar faces blur as I try to find just one. One in the crowd.