Page 33 of The Christmas Competition

I shrugged, coming back to my seat. “You did see it. I just gave you a very accurate rendition.”

“Well, I appreciate it.” Another smile. I liked his grumpy face when it was smiling. Scratch that, I think I liked his grumpy face, full stop. “You’re very expressive,” he added, and a little bit of the shine was taken off my high. Is that a good thing or a bad thing? I wanted to ask. Are you saying that I’m too much?

For once in my life, I opted to stay quiet, and we each took a sip of our coffees.

“Anyway. I am sorry,” I said, finding my voice again. “And I would like to pay for any Santa-​related damages.”

He waved a hand. “There was no expense. I just duct-​taped his broken heart.”

“Oh, don’t say that.” I winced. “I hate to think that I broke Santa’s heart.”

He chuckled. “Don’t worry. He got over it.”

“Still. I don’t want to end up on the naughty list.”

“Mm” was all he said, and yet I got the suggestion of innuendo behind the sound, and the hint of heat smoldering in his eyes.

I got the distinct impression that although Kerr Murdoch was outwardly quiet and a little grumpy, he might be a bit of a stud beneath that. Unless I was imagining things, of course—​after all, I was a sex-​starved single woman who was developing a major crush on the neighbor I couldn’t stand only a few days ago.

“In any case, I had been planning to come over after work to confess my sins, and also to apologize and offer to pay for damages.” I paused to raise my brows. “But then I discovered that my poor reindeer had been placed in a very compromising position and plastered all over social media.”

There was definitely a hint of a smile playing at his lips, and again I was drawn to thinking how lovely and smooth and full they looked. But I should definitely not be thinking about that.

“How unfortunate,” he said in that velvety-​smooth voice.

I waited a couple of seconds, but he didn’t say anything more. “Anything you want to confess to?” I ventured.

His smile stretched out fully. “Okay. You got me. But I’m not sure that I’m sorry about it. It was pretty funny.”

I couldn’t contain my smile. Who would’ve thought that crabby Kerr had a sense of humor? I certainly had not, until today.

His smile fell all of a sudden, and I found myself desperate to put it back on his handsome face. “Though perhaps I am sorry,” he added. “Because if not for that, then you wouldn’t have added those extra lights and the fire wouldn’t have started.” He winced. “It was my fault.”

Immediately, and without thinking, I reached over to touch his hand. Just a small graze of my fingers to his warm skin, but my fingertips tingled all the same, even after I removed them. Perhaps he felt it too, because he glanced down at where the contact had been, and when he looked up again I could’ve sworn something was simmering in his eyes.

“It was certainly not your fault. I take one hundred percent of the blame because I was the idiot who overloaded the plug socket and forgot to check the smoke detector. I mean, I really should have known better.”

He shrugged. “I’m sure you’ve had a lot on your mind. This Christmas can’t be an easy one for you.”

My breath caught as I nodded slowly, surprised that he would connect the dots there. Though he and I were in the same boat as far as that was concerned. He and Aileen had split before Drew and me, but both uncouplings had occurred since last Christmas. This was his first one alone too. Something about that made me feel a little closer to him. As if we could understand each other. I opened my mouth to voice something along those lines but was interrupted by my phone buzzing with a message. I glanced at it, expecting that Rona might be checking on me. But I ended up doing a double take, my eyes widening in shock with a jolt to my gut as I took in Drew’s name on the screen. Drew, who had not messaged me in a few months.

Forgetting for a second that there was someone with me, I grabbed the phone and opened the message.

Hey, Nisa. Hope you’re good. Just messaging to share our good news! Aileen is pregnant, due date May 10th! He or she might have the same birthday as you

Stunned, I stared at the screen, my heart cleaving in two. A churning sensation gathered in my stomach as bile rose up into my throat and a heavy ache began to throb behind my eyes. They were having a baby?

I had asked—​even begged—​Drew to start a family with me, but he’d kept saying he wasn’t ready. That he didn’t want to relinquish certain parts of our lifestyle for a baby yet. And so, as with everything else I wanted in life, I’d compromised for him.

“Are you okay?”

I glanced up into the concerned warmth of Kerr’s gaze, suddenly remembering that he was in the room, and feeling sick with embarrassment at his witnessing this latest upset, because there was no way the anguish wasn’t painted in great detail across my face. “It’s a message . . . from . . . ah.” I paused, attempting to force the words out. “From Drew.”

The space between his brows was furrowed, no doubt wondering why a simple text had upset me so much. Unable to read it again, I simply pushed the phone toward him.

Kerr hesitated, seeming unsure whether he should read it. But I didn’t have the energy to hide this. In any case, Aileen would no doubt be messaging him soon with the same news. I gave him a small, permissive nod and then he lifted it, reading the screen. His frown deepened. “Wow.”

“I know,” I managed to say, though I was unsure if he meant Wow, it’s weird that my ex is having a baby with your ex or Wow, that happened fast or, my personal favorite, Wow, that is the most tone-​deaf and hurtful message I have ever read.