Page 51 of Crash Course

I blink and reach for it, coming back to the library and reality with it.

Theo. I don’t answer but the reminder of my brother’s existence sends a pang of guilt through me.

My brother, who genuinely likes this girl, who I’ve watched get better in the weeks since she came into his life.

Who I promised to protect and look out for with everything in me.

He doesn’t deserve this.

Neither does she.

“I should go too.” If my voice is rougher than usual, I hope she doesn’t notice.

We pack up our bags and walk outside. It’s dinnertime, and there are only a few cars still in the front lot.

I stop between the Porsche and the Mustang. “How’d you score the ’67?”

“It was my dad’s. Took us three years to get it back on the road.”

That’s a big rebuild. I’m floored she fought her way through it.

“It needs more work,” I say, more harshly than necessary, my gaze lingering on the deep green paint. “Last time I was in there, it was a fucking mess.”

Shay flips me off, the amusement in her eyes softening the gesture. “There are lots of things I’d love to do, but it takes time. And money.”

“What’s your dream upgrade?” I ask, because suddenly, it’s the only thing I want to know. She gets cars more than most guys I grew up with, drivers and mechanics.

Shay chews her lip. “Supercharger. Hands down.”

I groan. “Of course it is. You’d rather add chaos than fix anything.”

“It’s not about speed—it’s about reaction,” she counters. “The second you ask for something, it gives it back.”

She’s smart and capable. It’s seriously impressive.

Though she’s never come out and said it, she’s also had a ton of challenges in her life, and something tells me it hasn’t gotten easier since she started at the academy.

When she goes to get in, I grab her door, if only to keep her here another moment. “Vogel’s right about one thing. If you get your shit together, Townie, you might actually survive here.”

Her expression softens, her lips curving. “Never doubted it.”

It’s a lie. But my mouth lifts too, like it’s our inside joke. A secret neither of us asked for.

If we were touching, she’d feel my heart speed up in my chest.

Of all the ways she’s disrupted my life in a few weeks—the car failures and insults and inconvenient fantasies—what fucks with me most is that I used to be able to lie to myself, and I can’t anymore.

Not about her.

16

Shay

Jameson: Can’t meet today.

When the text comes in Thursday morning, I know it shouldn’t make me spiral. But disappointment rises up, a living thing wrapping around my chest.

Though I wouldn’t admit it to another soul, I’ve been looking forward to our study sessions. Being forced to spend time with him made him more human. When neither of us could run for the door, we were forced to pull our punches.