Page 15 of Fragile hearts

“No, embarrassing, right? I wanted to, especially as a kid, but no one wanted to teach me.”

Carson’s nostrils flare. His hand clenches around the steering wheel. I had made peace with it years ago. The only person who knows I can’t do it is Ash. He offered to teach me, but he can’t ride it either. It’s something a lot of foster children can’t do. “A lot of foster children can’t ride a bike.”

Carson curses under his breath.

“Want to hear another embarrassing story?” I ask but continue before he can answer. “I was eighteen when I realized you could change the temperature of the water in the shower by turning a knob.”

“What. The. Fuck,” Carson whispers.

“An old foster parent told me there was a special part for warm water, so when I was eighteen I went to the store and asked for that special part, and the worker told me the only thing you need to do is turn a knob.”

“You had cold showers for eighteen years?” Carson is livid. He’s clenching his fingers so hard they turn white.

“Yeah, I could have had warm showers, but no one told me the truth. Embarrassing, huh?”

I avert my gaze, staring at the bypassing trees. I hadn’t told anyone that before. I felt so embarrassed when I was in the hardware store. It was right under my nose the whole time, and I didn’t know, but when you’re a kid and an adult tells you something, you believe them.

“Alexis, look at me.” I bite my lip. my hands shake in my lap. I don’t want to see the pity in his eyes. I know I didn’t have a great childhood, but it took me years to realize how bad it really was. Growing up, I thought it was normal not to eat three meals a day or to sleep on the floor after you accidentally spilled some water. But now I know it is indeed not normal. People have asked me before if I wished I had a normal childhood, but I don’t know what that’s like. My childhood was normal for me. I thought that every kid grew up the way I did.

I sigh, meeting Carson’s saddened eyes. “It’s fine,” I assure him. “I have warm water now, and I have a bath, so I can’t complain.”

“Still, that’s not something you should have experienced.”

I shrug nonchalantly, tapping my finger on my thigh. “It was a long time ago. I’m okay now.”

“It shouldn’t have happened.”

I pat Carson’s underarm lightly. “A lot shouldn’t happen, but we can’t always prevent it.”

The car slows as we near the auto shop. I stare at the building. The industrial place is embellished with two silver sliding doors. One is closed, the other one open, a man is standing near the open door and waves at us. Carson, to my shock, waves back. He gets out of the car and opens my door, before I can even touch the door handle, I smile at him as a thank you. He dips his head in acknowledgment.

I make my way towards the garage. Carson hangs beside me, matching me stride for stride. “Son!” the man greets, grabbing Carson into a hug. The resemblance is exquisite.

His father is a few inches shorter, and his hair is graying at the roots. But they have the same facial structure, the same nose and cheekbones. Only his father has two brown eyes. “Hi, Dad,” Carson greets, returning the hug. “This is Alexis.”

The older version of Carson holds out his hand. “Peter,” he says. Smiling down at me, the same smile his son has. He motions for me to follow as we walk further into the garage. There are all different kinds of equipment. There are several hydraulic jacks. And four vehicle lifts, with cars standing on them. “Here it is.” He moves aside, showing me my car. “I gave you a new battery since yours needed a replacement. And pumped up your wheels for you.”

“Thank you so much,” I say, touching the rear of my car.

“Carson!” A woman exits a room, which I’m guessing is some office. I can recognize her from afar. It’s been a while since I have seen her, but it’s definitely her. Cathy, the owner of the diner in town, she gave Micah and me some food and an ice cream for free a few days before Micah died. She gives her son a warm hug, then swivels to look at me.

“Alexis, look at you!” She frames my face in her hands, squeezing my cheeks together. “Oh my god, Mom, let her go,” Carson says, mortified. Cathy waves him off.

I meet Carson’s eyes over his mother’s shoulder. “I’m so sorry,” he mouths apologetically.

I grin at him, brushing him off. “It’s fine,” I mouth back.

“How have you been?” Her voice radiates warmth as she gently pats my cheek.

“I’m hanging in there. What about you?”

“We’re doing fine, sweetheart. You look so beautiful.” My cheeks heat up at her compliment. I can’t remember the last time someone other than Asher called me beautiful. “You should come to the diner tonight,” Cathy suggests as she lets me go and stands beside her husband. I haven’t been to the diner since I arrived here, scared that it might be too much to bear, since I have so many good memories there with Micah.

“Oh, I don’t know,” I hesitate.

Carson steps to stand beside me. “I can come too, if you’d like,” he whispers low enough so his parents don’t hear.

“You don’t have to do that,” I whisper back.