Page 73 of Graves

I laugh, then realize it’s the wrong reaction and cut it off. “That sounds—sorry—ridiculous.”

“Yeah.” Koh swallows hard, like there’s a thick lump in his throat, and continues in a strained voice. “But it eventually gets inside your head. Like a parasite. The man made me believe I was incapable of doing anything right without him. He brainwashed me, turned my mind into a labyrinth, and… made me more and more dependent on him.”

Koh sinks into his thoughts, staring past me with his mouth slightly open and breath held, as if someone were standing behind me. I tilt my head and catch his gaze. He shakes himself and sits up straight again.

“I was just a shadow of myself,” he says distantly, staring at the Japanese maple by the window. “Dependent. Insecure. Helpless. And weak. I had lost my self-respect.”

“You don’t seem weak to me,” I say gently.

Without turning his head, his eyes slide to mine. “I’m not mentally as strong as I appear. It’s in my head and it’s like a curse. I don’t know what I’ll do if I run into him. Just the thought paralyzes me and scares me.”

“What could he do to you?”

Koh laughs bitterly. “The man took my life. There’s nothing he couldn’t do to me.”

The person sitting in front of me now is the same one who rejected me from the beginning, only now I know the reason—or at least I think I do.

“You’re afraid he’ll find you if he sees your picture in the media.”

His expression hardens and he stares at me with empty eyes.

His silence is answer enough.

“I’ll try to keep you out of it. But I can’t promise anything.”

“Thanks. You’re really less of an asshole than I expected.”

I laugh. “Don’t tell anyone. They wouldn’t believe you.”

A smile spreads across Koh’s face. “I see the pressure you’re under. Tell me if there’s anything I can do for you.”

“Oh… And you’re apparently not the asshole you pretend to be either.”

Seeing Koh fight back a smile is both amusing and reassuring. I like his laugh, and even more how he always tries to keep it locked away.

I can’t think of anything he could do for me, so I just nod. “Thanks for the offer. I appreciate it.”

His phone lights up and starts vibrating on the table. I can’t read the name, but Koh raises his eyebrows in surprise and answers.

“Damian?”

“Koh!” I hear a male voice shout through the speaker. “Code Red! Are you home?”

Code Red? What the…?

Koh shoots up from his chair and switches the phone to the other ear.

“What? Where are you? … What? … No! Absolutely not! You have to come in the back! … I’m coming down. Be right there.”

“That sounded serious. Everything okay?”

“An emergency. That was my cousin. He’s bringing Levi, my brother. I’m going down to let them in. Can you… uh…” Koh makes a face like he doesn’t like what he has to say next. “I need towels.”

Without waiting for my reaction, he rushes off and the apartment door closes behind him. I sit on the terrace for a moment, stunned. Even Pixie woke up from Koh’s sudden departure, glancing sleepily at the open terrace door, then at me.

Towels?

It sounded urgent, so I leave the dirty dishes and go look for towels in the hallway closet. I already used the big ones in the kitchen yesterday. They’re now in a laundry basket, though I’m not sure if I should have just thrown them away. They were full of glass shards.