Page 69 of Play Room Actor

“This is how you eat pizza. My dad taught me. And he learned it from Sophia Loren.”

“Sophia Loren? She’s old!”

“Yeah, but in the movie The Gold of Naples, she explains how to eat pizza properly. And this is how you do it,” he said, pointing to the last folded slice in his hand. “Wanna take a bite?”

“I already had, but thanks.”

Kilian winked at me and took a big bite. “What did your dad teach you?”

I was just about to take a sip from my beer when his question caught me off guard. I stared at Kilian for a moment—or maybe through him. The noise around us faded, and my vision blurred.

“Everything okay?”

“Nothing,” I answered, my voice strained.

“Nothing?”

“I didn’t have a father.”

No one else was paying attention, and there were no comments when Kilian inched closer to me, leaning slightly forward.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to get too close.”

“It’s okay … I … didn’t have a mother, either.”

“Fuck, what?”

“I was in foster care for a long time.”

“But … where are your parents?”

“Somewhere?” I answered with a question of my own. “I don’t have parents. The only person in my life who comes close to family is Nico. And you’ve already met him.”

“Can I ask what happened?”

“The authorities took me out of there when I was five. I barely remember anything. But if they hadn’t, I probably would’ve starved to death.”

“Fuck …” Kilian wiped his mouth with the napkin and turned back to me. “You’re acting like you’ve got it all together, but I really don’t feel good about bringing this up.”

“I … well, I was in therapy,” I said and shrugged. “But I guess I haven’t processed everything, considering that …” I immediately stopped myself. Kilian had no idea about my experiences in the chemsex scene—an underworld I never would’ve entered if I hadn’t been so desperate for love and affection.

“What are you thinking about?” Kilian pressed.

“The mess down there didn’t just come out of nowhere,” I answered, shrugging again.

I wasn’t sure if Kilian bought my explanation, because he was clearly struggling to keep up his calm demeanor.

“You have no idea how much I still want to know about you, but I think for today, that’s enough. After all, we’re at a party.”

“Party!” Vanja shouted, raising her beer in the air.

“Let’s celebrate!” Jacob echoed, clinking his glass against hers.

I was amazed at how much I enjoyed Kilian’s company. Just sitting next to him made me feel like I was no longer alone—a feeling I’d spent my whole life trying to escape.

All of a sudden, Manuela, the dramaturg, appeared between us. She placed a hand on Kilian’s shoulder and bent down to speak to him. “Kilian, Favre is here.”

Kilian flinched at the name and, his curiosity piqued. “Tatjana Favre?”