Page 6 of Yours Truly

They’d been disinvited to the monthly family dinner at my parents’ house, so I hadn’t been forced to see this with my own eyes until now. I felt ill.

I sat down and tried my best to appear relaxed. “Hey. Sorry I’m late.”

Amy chewed on her lip in that way she did when she was nervous. “It’s okay. We figured you might go for drinks or something with your new coworkers. You know, for your first day?”

I scoffed to myself.

“Thank you for coming,” she said.

I nodded.

Thump.

Thump.

Thump thump thump.

Axes hitting walls.

I could feel the tunnel vision of an anxiety attack plucking at the edges of my sight, and I wondered how long I had until I’d have to get up and go, whether it was appropriate or not.

They sat there, looking at me like they didn’t know how to start.

I glanced at my watch. “I have an early shift tomorrow…” I lied.

Amy nodded. “Right. Sorry.” She tucked her hair behind her ear. “So, I don’t really know how to say this…”

“You’re getting married,” I said.

I could see the confirmation on her apologetic face before she uttered a word.

She nodded. “We’re getting married.”

Thump. Thump thump thump.

Laughing, shouting, the clink of forks on plates. Someone dropped a glass and it shattered and everyone cheered. The press of the room closed in on me, but I managed to smile in a way that I thought looked authentic.

“Congratulations,” I said. “Have you set a date?”

She looked at Jeremiah, and he smiled at her. “We’re thinking July,” he said.

I nodded. “Good. It’s a good month. Well, I look forward to being there.” I was amazed at how stoic I sounded.

Amy licked her lips. “We, um…we haven’t told anyone else yet. We thought you should be the first to know.”

“Thank you,” I said. “But that wasn’t necessary. I’m sure everyone will be thrilled.” I looked at my watch again. “It’s a little loud for me in here. I think I’m going to get going. Congratulations. And let me know if I can help in any way.”

They looked at me gratefully. I don’t know what they expected. Maybe they thought despite the graceful way I’d handled everything else up to this point that this might be the thing that pushed me over the edge. But I was fully committed to maintaining my position on this. Being difficult and indignant wouldn’t change it. And they didn’t mean to hurt me.

Even if they did.

I got up and tried my best to walk at a normal speed out of the bar. The thumps chased me, each one like a gunshot to my heels.

I felt myself just outpace the wave of anxiety as I burst into the cool April air and leaned forward on my knees, gasping for breath on the sidewalk.

So it was finally happening. The woman I loved had moved on. She was marrying someone else.

And the someone else was my brother.