Page 84 of The Friend Zone

My buzz made me careless.

And I couldn’t care less.

“Wow,” he said, looking reflective. “You must have really liked me. You didn’t brush your hair for two days in a row once.”

I launched into giggles and he laughed with me, putting his forehead to mine. “And I still thought you were the most beautiful woman I’d ever met.”

I squeezed my eyes shut, breathing him in, feeling his breath on my face. I wanted to hold this moment in suspended animation. These tender stolen seconds. My forehead pressed to his, his warm hand over mine, his heart beating against my palm. Him slowly turning me on a dance floor, telling me I’m beautiful.

His deep voice spoke over me softly. “Can I ask you a question?”

“What?” I whispered, opening my eyes.

“What does Sloan think of him?”

I laughed, shaking my head. “Sloan hates him.”

“Why?”

“Because she thinks I’ve settled.”

He furrowed his brow. “Settled? How? Is something wrong with him? Is he a dick?”

I let out a long breath. “No. He doesn’t want kids.”

He scoffed. “Well, there you go. The kid thing is too important. Can’t be with him.”

It felt like a punch right to my uterus. A hard lump bolted to my throat, and I had to look away from him because I was going to cry.

There it was, straight from his own lips.

The kid thing is too important. Can’t be with him.

He stopped turning us, and he put my face in his hands. Once I was looking at him again, I lost it. My chin quivered and tears spilled over my cheeks.

His eyes moved back and forth between mine. “Don’t marry him, Kristen.”

My heart cracked in half.

“Don’t marry him,” he whispered. “Please.”

There was something desperate about the way he said it. I studied the look in his eyes. Distress. Longing. Pleading.

This wasn’t the look of a man who just didn’t want to give up his booty call. This was feelings. Josh has feelings for me.

The realization hit me like a deep, cancerous, soul-reaching sadness. These emotions I could see he had for me—they should have made me happy. I should have been ecstatic to know that what I felt maybe wasn’t so one-sided. But instead, a bitter disappointment descended on my body making me so weak I worried my knees would give out.

I had to cut him loose.

This thing between us had gone as far as I could allow it to go.

I wasn’t going to marry Tyler. I think I’d known that the whole time. After I’d said no, he’d begged me to think about it. So I did. But I wasn’t going to be with either of them. I couldn’t.

The kid thing is too important. Can’t be with him.

I couldn’t love Tyler the way he deserved, and I couldn’t give Josh a family. I could never give either man what he really wanted.

TWENTY-FIVE