Page 70 of Falling Back to You

“Me and my horses are in Gainsborough all the time for movies. So I called in some favors.”

“You planned this?”

“Yeah, when you said you wanted to make the trip, I got to scheming.”

“Why would you go to all that trouble?”

“Because you wanted to ride horses on the beach.” He gently nudged my shoulder. “Come on.”

We exited the truck, and I noticed a sign that said, Reserved. No Parking Allowed, accompanied by orange cones blocking access to the parking lot. There was only one other vehicle in the lot, an oversized red truck with a horse trailer hitched to the back. Peeping inside one of the slats, I saw the trailer was empty, but the distinct smell of horsehair and hay lingered. The descent to the sand was narrow and required me to sidestep. When I walked into the open, my attention was drawn to two horses, one jet black and the other a sandy brown.

I hadn’t expected this, not from Oz. The sight of the horses made me realize what he’d done, and something inside me buckled. Warmth rushed up my chest so fast it felt like panic, like my own ribs couldn’t contain it. I could feel my throat tightening, that unmistakable sting behind my eyes, and I hated how quickly it all rose to the surface. I wasn’t supposed to fall apart over a gesture, no matter how thoughtful, no matter how precisely it touched the part of me I kept hidden.

“I forgot something in the car.” Snatching his keys, I made a quick escape back through the parking lot.

My first instinct was to step back, to fold into myself before Ozzie noticed the way my breath hitched. I could already feel the tears gathering, traitorous and hot, threatening to spill if I so much as blinked too long. I tried to swallow it down, the gratitude, the shock, the aching sweetness of being seen so clearly, but it only made my chest tremble harder.

No one had ever done anything like this. I was never granted favors or singled out. People rarely went out of their way for me. When we were together and Ozzie and I were just making ends meet, sure, there were flowers, picnics in the living room, and late-night dance parties, but nothing like this. This was planned and executed with me in mind when I was used to being an afterthought.

Standing outside the truck, I paced while taking several deep breaths. When I caught sight of Ozzie, I pulled my sunglasses from my bag and pressed them over my face right before he reached me.

“Hey, are you okay?”

“Yeah.” My voice was still strained and tense with emotion.

“Dial, look at me.”

Timidly turning around, I stared at him from behind my sunglasses.

“We don’t have to do this if you don’t want to.”

A tear streamed down my cheek. I wanted to savor it, to let the warmth of it settle into me, but the intensity of it caused me to run. Not from him, but from the vulnerability of being witnessed in this state. “Of course I want to,” I managed.

“Then why are you crying?”

“Because there’s fucking horses on the beach, Ozzie.” I shook my arm in the direction we’d both just come from.

“Okay. I’m not following… but okay.”

“Why would you do this?”

“Because making you happy makes me happy.”

Tears continued to roll down my face, and Ozzie removed my sunglasses. I stared up at him with blurred eyes, trembling because I was furious at myself for falling apart. Ozzie caressed my cheek, brushing my tears aside with his thumb.

“I’m scared,” I finally admitted, my voice barely above a whisper.

“I know.”

Without any additional words, we both understood I wasn’t talking about horse riding on a beach. It was him, this, trying again. But more importantly, the fear that it wouldn’t work and we’d be worse off than we were now. I’d loved and lost this man more times than I could count, with each failure leaving lasting scars.

Pressing my face into his chest, I bawled my eyes out while Ozzie held my trembling body. I was grieving the past, which for years had prevented me from building a real future. Loving another person was terrifying, which was what had kept me single for so long. Why give over my heart just for some asshole to break it? But Oz wasn’t any asshole, he was my asshole, and I wanted him back.

When I finally stepped away, I felt lighter. The worst had happened—I’d cried in front of Ozzie—and the world hadn’t ended. Was I a little embarrassed? Sure. But I was still here. And if he could try, so could I.

“Let’s saddle up.” I sniffled.

Our ride was everything I’d imagined it would be. Cool air whooshing past as we rode alongside the shore, the fresh, salty taste waking up my desire for adventure and attempting new things. I glanced over at Ozzie, who was more focused on me than the strip of sand ahead. His smile took up the entirety of his face. Sonora’s and Cinder’s hooves seemed to fall in sync with the lapping waves. My being a country girl, nature always had a calming effect on me. When I was stressed or anxious, I’d drive to Pine Hollow River, close my eyes, and just listen to the burbling of the water, feel the sun kissing my skin as if it were recharging my depleted energy.